There are no two ways about it–rejection can sting. Even the most confident of us can feel like being turned down for a date is a confidence knock.
However, there isn’t any guaranteed approach that promises zero chance of being rejected, and the best strategy can be to frame the question, and your mindset, so you can protect yourself emotionally if the answer isn’t what you wanted to hear.
That said, there are some excellent tactics that avoid the common stumbling blocks, such as putting pressure on him to respond immediately, simply asking at the wrong time, or without clarity that you’re asking for a date.
Let’s look at how to boost your chances of a positive response and how to get a guy to date you when you’re sure he’s the right person for you.
Picking the Right Time and Place to Ask for a Date
Interested in how to ask a guy out in a cute way that doesn’t feel highly geared? I’d recommend thinking about the setting and choosing a time when you’re relaxed and can chat for as long as needed. Here are a few examples:
- Rushing to send a quick text can make it feel formal and business-like, so adding a funny GIF, using a laid-back tone, or waiting until you have space to send a thoughtful message is ideal.
- Asking face-to-face is always better but equally impossible if you’re chatting on a dating site. I’d avoid an ominous ‘I have something to ask you’ or ‘can we talk’ message–work your feelings into a natural conversation!
- Demanding an instant answer can feel abrasive, and if the guy you like is sensitive might come across the wrong way. Give him time and acknowledge that he’s probably not eager to start sending flirty messages during work hours or dinner with his parents.
Timing can affect our mood and tone, so waiting until you’re alone together or aren’t under any pressure to wrap up your conversation as quickly as possible gives you a much greater chance of a positive outcome.
How to Ask a Guy for a Date
Choosing the right words can feel tricky, but it needn’t be! One of the best ways to ask a guy out is to focus on what you have in common and an activity or location that you know will appeal. If you’re both really into music, fine dining, art galleries, or sports, there are many opportunities to invite him to join you at an event, activity, or meal where you can get to know each other better.
The brilliant aspect is that, because you’re asking for a date in an environment where the guy you like is already familiar and comfortable, it sets things up for a smooth, chilled date rather than a formal evening dinner or organizing a date somewhere where either of you feels a little apprehensive.
Finally, if you’re genuinely nervous, you might want to consider how to get your crush to ask you out if you aren’t comfortable making the first move.
A lot depends on his personality, but dropping hints, using body language, or even telling him directly that you’d say yes if he were to ask you out can all work. Use your knowledge of this guy to decide what’s likely to be the best approach, and if he doesn’t pick up on the hint, feel free to take the initiative.
My biggest tip is to try and shrug off your insecurities and realize that if, for any reason, he doesn’t say yes, it’s a connection that wasn’t 100% right for you–no more, no less.