You are a sensitive soul, an empath, a healer...and sometimes people take advantage of that. It’s time for you to get in touch with your inner strength. It will be difficult at first, since you’re so used to helping other people. But in the end, embracing your needs for a change, is going to attract everything to you. And that includes faces from the past.
If you scored 30-40 points then it’s safe to say that he knows how you feel and that the relationship ended partly because you trusted him too much. You opened yourself up emotionally too soon. The intensity of the relationship may have scared him off. He may have sensed your life goals (commitment, marriage, family) and figured he’s not ready yet.
However, you must also keep in mind that it’s quite possible you got mixed up with a narcissist. Narcissistic or sociopathic men sort of defy logic and they can make you feel awful about yourself, but not because of anything you did.
The fact that you’re entirely sure of why the relationship ended is telling. You know he had a temper, you know he was troubled. You know you made mistakes...maybe you even cheated because you felt so lost or so deprived of love.
But one thing remains true of any scenario that brought you to this point. You were never in love. Whether he said it or not, you rarely ever felt it.
It always seemed more like you were trying to make love happen. You convinced yourself if you suffer just a little bit more, he might eventually fall in love. Things might eventually heal and become peaceful again.
Of course you wish you had more closure, because his intention was always to punish you and deprive you of the closure you needed to move past him. But since you broke up, you have to admit that he rarely ever contacts you, never brags about his new dates, and just doesn’t consider you a friend anymore.
He has moved on. And the worst part is, he has still cast a spell on you. Or as they say nowadays, he is still occupying space inside your head.
He does nothing to reach out to you, but you still think about him. Even worse, (and this is what concerns me) is that you’re purposely avoiding opportunities to move on. It feels better to wait, to stew over mistakes of the past, and either to love him or hate him - RATHER than taking a step forward.
If you’re miserable without him and haven’t moved beyond that swamp of despair that the breakup put you in then, he has won - he has destroyed your spirit.
You deserve more than that. You need to move on, you need to embrace life again. You need to get in touch with the You of the past, the one who knew happiness before you ever met him.
And it’s not just “so you can meet another great guy and fall in love again…” because maybe you don’t want to do that. Maybe it hurts you even think that way.
But in that case, you need to move on for yourself. You need to move on and transform your life into something you can be proud of. Because when you do that, then you will always have the option of winning him back, and starting that attraction up again, or moving on and leaving him in the lurch for a change.
If you've broken up with someone you love and you want to get back together with him...
There's one mistake that you absolutely MUST avoid if you want him to take you back and want a REAL relationship together.
It's something that I call, a "Broken Attachment."
I call it a Broken Attachment because you're giving him the wrong impression of who you are and what you want.
This lowers your value in his eyes and makes it nearly impossible to get him back.
If you want to know more about what a Broken Attachment is...
Talk soon,
Matthew Coast
P.S. Want to know what you should do instead to get him back?