How to Start a Conversation with a Guy Over Text (Send Him THIS)

Make sure the conversation flows naturally with logical segues into new conversations. Don’t force it. When in doubt, say goodbye and just text him a couple days later with a new topic in mind.

Starting a conversation with a guy over text can be the most intimidating thing! Not only are you the one making the first move (which some women really don’t like to do at all) but you also have the added pressure of trying to think of something interesting to say. That’s where the awkwardness really becomes killer.

“If I text him he’s going to know I like him! What should I say to let him know I like without being too weird?”

And then you finally come up with something and hit that send button and then the panic sets in!

“Oh no, he just read it…and he’s not saying anything back! What do I do?!”

Well first off, blame Facebook for creating that awful “Seen Friday 8:37 PM” message. I mean, our lives were just fine and dandy before we learned that our friends and family and crushes sometimes just IGNORE us for hours on end! I mean that’s way more information than we needed to know!

But that said, let’s put your worst fears to rest right now. Chances are, he’s not thinking anything negative about you at all. He’s probably just thinking, “What is she talking about?” And going about his regular routine.

People usually don’t hyperfocus on stuff we say, especially if we say something only mildly dorky or moderately weird. That’s just everybody. Everybody has bad days, everyone tells lame jokes, and yeah sometimes the humor gets lost in translation.

So first thing’s first, stop freaking out about it! Even if you said something you wish you could take back, it’s probably not going to affect your crush at all. What you do need to do right now is back away just a little bit and stop responding impulsively and adding fuel to the fire.

Instead, remember these tips on starting conversations with a guy over texting.

1. Approach him as a friend.

If the idea of you hitting on him is psyching you out, then stop thinking of it in a dating context. Tell yourself, this is not a date! Start a conversation as just a friend. Someone who knows him has respect for him and knows just a little bit about him. He should have no objection to the two of you talking as friends.

Maybe you’re wondering, “Doesn’t every guy think about having sex with all of his female friends?” (and so doesn’t this mean we’re not just talking but secretly dating?”)

The truth is no one actually knows what a man is thinking. He may be attracted to you and thinking, “Hey a pretty girl likes me! How you doin’?” or he may in fact be totally oblivious. Believe it or not, some guys just get preoccupied with other things at times and actually don’t associate a woman talking to them with sex.

But let’s say for the sake of argument, he is physically attracted to you. Still, that doesn’t necessarily mean anything important, nor is it going to affect this “platonic” conversation. Most guys just think, “Hey a pretty girl is talking to me!” but then follow up those thoughts with something more down to earth, like, “Wonder what she wants?” or “Probably just needs a favor.”

In other words, the fleeting idea of “Is this a date?” doesn’t last very long. The guy is eventually just going to chill and ask what’s up.

2. Always have a point to the conversation.

Texting has given us the unfortunate side effect of empty conversation. “Hey” and “MoF” and “SCNR!” are not really saying anything of value and yet many people still seem to use these phrases just to “say something” and grab the attention of the other person. Bad idea! Conversation should always be about something, specific and limited in time span. Simply knowing what you want to talk about, conversing intelligently, and then getting out of that strange awkward but wonderful conversation ASAP is going to help you avoid saying weird or confusing things.

Even if you are just sticking to “safe” conversations (like “what are you doing?”) it’s best to start with a question or a statement and not just a worthless phrase like “Hi” which puts all the pressure on the guy to think of something to say. Have something specific need in mind and once you explore that topic FULLY, then it’s time to end this text.

This doesn’t mean you have to rush through the conversation. But it does mean that as soon as you receive the answer you were looking for and the conversation seems to be winding down, you end it. Leave him wanting more.

3. Make this conversation all about him. Get him to text his thoughts and opinions and encourage him to keep texting.

There is one easy way to get a man to talk, even if he is the strong silent type (which a lot of men are). That is, to ask open-ended questions about subjects he’s interested in. So if you want this conversation to be a comfortable length, not too rushed or awkward, and to be lots of fun, then your objective is to encourage him to relax and start texting you answers based on your interesting questions.

Your questions get a lot more interesting to him if they’re about him—what he’s doing, how he’s doing in his hobby or career, and so on. It’s also a smart idea to continue the conversation you were having when you last spoke in person, rather than awkwardly force a conversation of your own choosing that he might not have any interest in.

The best way to have a natural dialog is to follow the flow of the conversation. Start talking about things you both already have in common and then progress forward into a new topic when he brings it up, or when you can think of a way to connect it to the previous conversation.

For example, “Speaking of movies, you said last time that you were going to see Star Wars. So what did you think? You see? Natural, not awkward. Makes you appear confident and a good conversationalist.

As we’ve discussed, you don’t really need a lot of heavy artillery just to start a texting conversation with your crush. Remember: be a cool friend, talk about something specific (and don’t keep chatting so long that he gets bored) and ask open-ended questions about topics you both have in common.

Now the next part is where it gets tricky…how do you keep him talking and get him to like you though texting? That will be the focus of our next article.

You might hate this TEXT but it leaves men obsessed

I would like to send you something very personal…

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==> See It Here

It just a top secret TEXT MESSAGE and you just have to casually use it 3 times on any man of your choosing.

On the first attempt feelings of IMPULSIVE LOVE for you will fill up his body and flood his brain faster than he can comprehend.

==> See It Here

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Starting from his forehead, going down his spine, and to the rest of his body.

And on the third attempt, he’ll be pushed over the edge with so much OBSESSION…

That he’ll ignore every other woman and will be dying to make you his lover for life.

Here is the best part –

Use it exactly as described on the next page and his old
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See you soon and all the best.

Matthew Coast

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

About The Author

Matthew Coast

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