When you’re young you usually don’t understand the concept of fake. Fake people, fake relationships, fake anything. Why would anyone pretend to be happy?
But as you get older, you start to notice the dishonesty. You start to see that people say things they don’t mean.
And sometimes, you might even find yourself in a relationship that seems fake. It’s not necessarily that anyone is lying or cheating. Rather, it’s the idea that one or even both of you are not really in love.
You go through the motions. You say the right things. You treat each other with general respect, you know, no devious behavior. But something’s missing. How does this happen? More importantly, how do you know you’re in one of these fake relationships?
1. The entire relationship is based on living together – but with hardly any interaction.
He’s never there for you at night or in the day. Even when he’s with you, he seems distant. He is happy when you live up to your requirements, but talking to you and loving you doesn’t really make him happy. All you sense is that there’s something fake about this relationship, just by his absence.
He may be physically absent (working long hours or hanging out with family) or mentally and emotionally absent. Sadly, he seems happier when he’s alone or with friends – never with you.
2. You don’t communicate very often. You make excuses as to why communication and honesty are unnecessary.
It’s more comfortable to pretend, to avoid communication altogether, than talk about anything too close to the truth. In this case, you’re probably not compatible at all. You’ve both just convinced yourself that you’d rather be living with someone than the alternative, which is to live alone. Some people call this a domestic partnership. Some people call it what it really is – a fake marriage.
3. There is a strange lack of passion, lack of romance, lack of connection between the two of you.
This was unfortunately common back in the day, especially for closeted gay men and the wives that tried, unsuccessfully, to love them. But even today it still happens and it’s not always because he’s gay.
Sometimes a man is not attracted physically to the woman he’s with. Sometimes he loses the initial attraction and realizes he has nothing in common with his wife/girlfriend. Sometimes he might even lose attraction because he’s holding a grudge about something. Or it could be that there is sexual dysfunction or poor body image, or something like that.
But a total lack of passion means there is something false about his “intimate” relationship.
4. You never actually settle the conflict. You just ignore it, ignore each other, and resent the relationship.
Letting things go and forgiving each other is not the same thing as ignoring conflict. Some couples avoid fighting which is good in theory…but they never actually talk out their disagreements. They stew over these conflicts inside. Eventually, they confide in someone else, figuring it’s not even worth it to try and talk to their partner.
If this happens to you, don’t let it go. In order to forgive each other and move past something you first have to talk it out. Let him know how you feel. Hear his point of view. Resolve the conflict rather than ignoring it. Or else you’re just slowly distancing yourself from each other.
5. One or both of you will insist on being affectionate in public, but rarely in private.
If you notice that one or both of you overcompensate when you’re in public and are all over each other (to the point where other people talk about you), and yet there’s nothing like that going on at home, that’s a problem.
It feels fake because your partner (or you, or both) wants to present a false image of what your relationship is like. Sometimes we try to convince ourselves of something that we know isn’t true. The truth is, you become someone else when other people are around – not your true self.
That leads us to the next sign…
6. Your partner never lets you be your “true self.”
He doesn’t believe in you, namely because the “you” that you actually want to be, is not who he wants you to be. You can’t be your true self around him because he doesn’t encourage you, doesn’t like that version of you, and doesn’t understand why you can’t be more “you know, normal.”
He discourages your ambitions. He seems embarrassed or bored when you talk about things that interest you. In short, he wants another version of you that doesn’t exist. He wants you to compliment him but has no idea who you really are. These relationships are not real. You can’t continue to live a lie.
7. You never talk about the future…this is all just for the now.
Relationships that are doomed never feel long-term. Talk about the long-term future is very hypothetical and uncomfortable. You never sense he wants to talk about it. Maybe you don’t even like bringing it up. Both of you sense that this relationship is limited, it’s not going to last forever.
But maybe you just don’t like the idea of giving up, or having another ex, or disappointing your parents. In any case, an unwillingness to discuss the future, and yet pretending as if this is real love, is only hurting you.
In closing, being in a fake relationship is indeed heartbreaking. In some ways, it does feel as if you’re still alone. You have someone in your life and yet you never feel heard, or loved. It’s all about keeping up appearances, doing what’s expected of you.
That’s no way to live your life. While breaking up might seem scary or heart-wrenching now, understand that the longer you wait, it will become even more difficult. Ultimately, you have to be with someone who loves you – not just someone who can live with you but is never truly intimate with you. You deserve the total package, love, respect, passion, and truth.
The 5 Word Phrase That Destroys a Man’s Love For You And Drives Him Out Of Your Life
There’s a simple 5 word phrase that will destroy any man’s love for you and drive him out of your life completely…
It usually comes out as an honest question when you want to connect with him…
But only serves to push him away and slowly kill your relationship from the inside out…
It can take a man who is filled with love and passion for you…
And make him feel cold, distant, and uninterested…
Have you figured out what it is yet?
Many women send this as a text message when they’re feeling insecure…
And then are confused why he suddenly pulls away and disappears completely…
Most of the women who ask it don’t even know how harmful it is…
Yet it can take a relationship that seems like it’s perfect…
A relationship where you feel loved, cared for, and like you’ve finally found “the one”…
And overnight, it can tear that relationship apart…
Leaving you confused, frustrated, and heartbroken…
If you don’t know what this simple yet seemingly innocent question is…
I want you to stop what you’re doing and go watch this video presentation that I put together for you at the link below…
Click here to watch the video now <<
My name is Matthew Coast and I’ve been teaching in the dating industry on since 2005…
I’ve helped hundreds of thousands of women, all over the world…
Get into relationships where they feel loved, seen, and cherished by the men they’re with…
When you click the link this link right here <<
I show you what this 5 word phrase is…
I’ll teach you about why men pull away, how to stop it from happening…
And how to attract the man you want…
Into a relationship where you’re loved and adored and treated like a priority…
No matter how painful things have been in your past…
You can attract a great man and have a great relationship…
Just click the link on your screen and the watch the video right now…
If you’re struggling with men pulling away from you…
If you’re tired of giving everything to a relationship and only being taken for granted…
And if you’re ready to have a man see you as a woman that he wants to be with forever…
