Signs of Emotional Attraction

Here’s one of the more interesting questions I’ve been asked recently.

“We all know that if you like a guy you shouldn’t sleep with him too soon. Because eventually his physical attraction to you will turn into an emotional attraction. But what does emotional attraction look like? How do you tell the difference between a guy who wants sex and a guy who’s falling in love?”

This is a good question because you could argue men who are players, and who don’t have any serious intentions, will mimic the behaviors of men who are actually falling in love. After all, if the guy can fake a strong emotional connection for just one night, then hasn’t he won and haven’t you lost?

So we have two issues to consider. One, does this actually happen – do men “fake love” just to have sex? And two, are there any signs that suggest REAL emotional attraction?

How Often Do Men Fake It?

I’m sure it does happen just by the law of averages. But I’m also fairly sure that men who only want to get laid have a threshold for how long they’re willing to wait. For most of these guys, they’re gone the second they find a more promising opportunity.

That’s the first sign right there. A man who loves you, who’s falling for you, makes time for you and spending that time with you is more important than just sex alone.

Men who don’t want a serious relationship have far less patience. The harder you make them work for it, the longer they have to wait, the faster they realize this one night stand just isn’t worth their effort.

A man who’s emotionally attracted will SHOW you that he’s interested in you by making sacrifices, investing time, and having deeper conversations that involve emotions.

Besides, the real issue is not “Whether a man is faking it.” The real issue is what are you actively doing to help him fall in love with you and see you as something special, beyond just a physical affair?

Because I can safely say a lot of men are just “stagnant” in casual relationships. They want friends with benefits. They want mindless sex. Guess what, they want emotional connection too, because that makes sex better. They just don’t want commitment.

They have no reason to pursue a commitment, since they don’t feel any emotional attraction and they’re already getting sex for free.

So if you want a man to chase you and fall in love your priority should be to make him feel emotional attraction. Stop letting him be “stagnant”. Give him emotional stimulation so that he feels emotional attraction. Click here to read a related article on how to evoke more emotion out of a man.

What Signs Show Emotional Attraction?

Once he starts feeling emotional attraction to you, he will show it – and in more ways than just time investment. Consider also these signs:

1. He loves your humor, your wit and the way your mind works.

A person’s sense of humor is actually closely connected to how they feel about life. It’s hard to “fake” a shared sense of humor. When you find things to laugh about with your date, you’re actually finding similarities in personality and perspective.

2. The more you both reveal of yourselves, the greater your attraction becomes.

When emotional attraction is real, the vulnerability you share only increases intimacy. When he confides in you, or you confide in him, the attraction grows and you crave even more intimacy and connection!

But when there is no true emotional attraction, more vulnerability is a turn off. When he’s not into you, he won’t want to share his heart, nor will he respond to your efforts to confide in him. When there’s no connection, there’s just “politeness” and pity, not genuine attraction.

3. He doesn’t just want your sex…he wants your advice, your opinion, your everything!

When a man is distracted by sex, it’s mainly all about flirting and intense emotion. When he’s falling for you and there’s true emotional attraction he begins to take an interest in your mind. He wants to know all about you so that he can plan a life around you, understand what makes you tick, and why you think the way you do. He respects your mind, while also desiring your body. Men who are in love want both!

4. Your values match.

You could say that incompatibility starts at the point where your values are completely different from each other. If you both want different things, see the world differently, and have altogether different goals in life, sex may be the only thing you have in common. Emotionally, there won’t be much to build on.

But when your values match, when you have similar goals and outlooks on life, chemistry is stronger. There’s not a great need to “act” or pretend, since you already have similar views on sex, romance, commitment and living together. With shared PASSION (for life, for belief, for faith, and so on) comes true emotional attraction. The morals, values and perspectives are what make you and what brings you together with the love of your life.

Which is why I always encourage you to be proud of your values, develop your values, and work on your self-confidence so that you can express how you honestly feel.

After you notice these sure signs of emotional compatibility, then pay attention to the level of progress you see. For example, does he start introducing you to his friends, family and inner circle? Does he involve you in his life, telling you about daily or weekly happenings? Does he imagine a future that includes you? Does he want your company even if it’s a romantic scenario or even a date? Is your presence, your mind, what truly soothes him?

If he feels emotionally involved with you, he welcomes you into his personal life. There’s no need for mystery. It’s not just about quantity of time spent, but quality as well!

10 Magic Love Triggers That Make Men Fall Hard For You

Have you ever been near someone who gave you a strange spine tingling sense of excitement?

Have you ever felt those infamous little butterflies in your stomach fluttering around when your secret crush walked by?

Have you ever had the hairs raise on the back of your neck as someone you were in love with unknowingly brushed past you?

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Talk soon,

Matthew Coast

P.S. If you’ve been banging your head against the wall because you’ve fallen for a man who’s frustratingly unavailable…

Or if you’re being treated as an option with a guy and want him to feel like you’re “the one” he’s been looking for his entire life…

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About The Author

Matthew Coast

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