Does Your Ex Want You Back? 6 Signs to Look For…

The breakup always feels so final, doesn’t it? Tears are shed. Statements are made that can never be taken back. You move on, your ex moves on. Your life is ready to take another turn…

And then a funny thing happens. You can’t stop thinking about him. He can’t stop talking to you, courting your attention. How can this be? Why do some couples have such dramatic breakups only to get back together again?

Maybe you’ve even been in this on again and off again relationship yourself and are at a loss to explain why it happens…except that you still have strong feelings for him.

You’re not alone. In fact, some statistical findings suggest that 50% of all couples that break up will eventually get back together. The same 2013 university study suggested that getting back together was on the basis that one or both partners had changed.

Even more interesting are the reasons why couples decide to stay together. Some of these reasons included optimism, emotional investment in a partner, a sense of family obligation and even a fear of the unknown that would result after the end of the marriage. The biggest majority of subjects said they would want to get back together to reclaim the intimacy they established with each other.

Even among partners who definitely wanted to leave due to infidelity, incompatibility and other major issues, many couples still claimed that they hesitated to leave. They thought seriously about getting back together.

So let’s assume right now that there’s at least a 50 / 50 shot of getting your ex back. The secret to getting back the relationship you lost is to appear as the stronger person—the one who needs the relationship LESS. This is going to be next to impossible if you do any of the following options:

And so on. All of these manipulative tactics work against you. Your main objective is to show him that you have moved on and remind him that HE wants you back.

First things first, let’s discuss how you can tell if he wants you back and if there’s real hope for you two getting back together. We’re going to review six signs that show his true feelings for you and whether he still has an irresistible attraction for you.

If you notice any of these signs then relax…it’s only a matter of time before he comes back to you.

1. You stay in touch and talk frequently.

The most obvious sign is that the two of you still talk frequently. It’s usually natural to want to avoid talking to your ex, especially if there’s bad blood between you. But if your ex is actually going out of his way to create a regular conversation with you, through email, or phone or chat, or even in person, it’s a huge sign showing he CANNOT let you go. He may not actually understand he wants you back yet but give him time.

2. He admits he has feelings for you.

Just because he won’t say he loves you or that he wants you back doesn’t mean he’s over you. Men tend to form intense emotional attachments to their partners, especially if he’s been married, or has dated his partner for a long time. He also shows you he’s the more “obsessed one” by making first contact. While email and chat are a bit superficial, if he actually calls you on the phone or makes an in-person date with you, that’s a very positive sign he can’t let go.

3. He leaves things over at your house.

These things might be physical items (his “stuff” that he never gets around to picking up) or it could be even intangibles like shared email accounts, Facebook relationship status, or even a bit of nostalgia. Even something as seemingly insignificant as an old user handle (how you first met online) that he never got around to changing or replacing counts as “things” left over. Why is this important? Because an unwillingness to pick up stuff indicates he’s not ready to let go yet. He’s keeping you close because he isn’t sure if he wants to get back together or not.

When a guy is still in love with you he will keep trying to win you over and impress you. He may be playing coy and pretending as if he has a great social life now. But if he’s always bragging or trying to make you jealous then he’s trying to create attraction—a good sign. If he keeps harping on whether you’re seeing anyone, it’s another good sign. A man who is truly over you will either be happy for your new love, or will simply not care what you’re doing.

5. He acts differently around you.

One of the most positive signs that he wants you back, because she’s “showing you” that he’s changed as opposed to just telling you or promising you. He wants to give you evidence that he’s a new man and that he wants to give the relationship another try. He may not rush into a commitment right away, but this new attitude is a step in the right direction.

6. He keeps conveniently showing up wherever you’re are and chatting.

If he’s too shy to ask you out he may stage an “accidental meeting” somewhere where he’s very sure to run into you. Maybe he knows where you’re going at a certain hour or even checks your social media pages to see your schedule. If this is the case, he’s actually doing lots of research and making a great effort to interact with you. He’s willing to invest time in you and orchestrate all these silly things just to be around you? He definitely wants you back!

When you see these signs, remember the most important tip in winning an ex back. Don’t chase him. Give him the attention he’s working for, but let him continue to work for your approval. More importantly, don’t reward him with attention UNTIL he demonstrates ways in which he’s changing. This is the best way not only to get him back, but to make him excited about winning you back!