5 Signs He Wants You to Flirt with Him

We previously discussed signs to look for that show a man is scared to make the first move. It happens more often than you think, even with guys who are good looking, successful and confident. Remember that a confident guy is not always confident in every respect of his life. We’re all human and yeah, we all have bad days sometimes.

Of course, the best case scenario is that he swallows his pride, mans up and makes the first move…even if it’s a risk! That’s romantic, right? Sure it is and when he goes for it and you reciprocate those feelings, it’s a pretty amazing moment!

The problem is not all guys are going to do this. In fact, I might venture to say that most men will probably just walk away and suffer in silence, rather than make a move where there is significant risk they will be rejected. Why is this?

Well first off, because not all men have the “body armor” to take rejection after rejection. Some men are actually really good at deflecting rejection, insults, excuses and “no thank you’s.” They enjoy being rejected because that’s part of the fun! Now it’s time to adapt and try a new approach.

But not all men do this! Most men will probably walk away, not only if they get rejected at the first move, but sometimes even before they make the first move.

There might also be a cluster of secondary reasons why a guy might back away and not ask a woman out. Maybe the situation is awkward. Maybe he feels guilty about liking you because of your unique situation. (i.e. you’ve always been friends…he doesn’t want to ruin the friendship) Or maybe he feels that you’re not interested in him, since you’re not giving him the specific signals he’s used to seeing when flirting with other women.

In any case, it’s very likely he is NOT going to take that big risk. There’s too much to lose and the situation feels unstable. He’d rather save face and walk away with dignity than embarrass himself by pouring his heart out.

It’s over right?

No! It doesn’t have to be. Remember that under some circumstances you can make the first move. Or better yet, you can flirt with him first and then get him more comfortable in making the first move. Here are five signs that he wants you to flirt with him and some suggestions that may help the two of you break the ice.

1. He is always happy to be in your presence.

He smiles, he makes an effort to be near you, and he’ll chat about anything! But…he never seems to go beyond nice conversation.

Solution: Start calling him on his “nice behavior.” Simply drawing attention to how nice he is and how much he seems to love being around you is a great way to start sexual tension. Let’s see how he responds…he may even admit that he likes you.

2. He introduces you to his family and friends.

Solution: He hasn’t asked you to date him yet…but he’s made sure that you’ve met his parents, his extended family and his closest friends. You already feel like a major friend in his life.

Solution: Pique his curiosity by asking him what his friends and family think about you… and about your unique friendship. Try to goad him into admitting that some people think you two might be an item. Then ask him why that’s such a terrible idea? Maybe he’ll admit he’s thought about it before…

You could also start talking to his friends or family on a regular basis. Don’t be surprised if they spill the beans on how their boy really feels about you. Sometimes friends and family like to “move things along”, especially if they know one of you or both of you feels shy.

3. He works up the nerve…to touch you.

He may not be admitting his feelings for you, but lately he’s worked up the nerve to touch you more often…or at least more than he’s ever touched you before. He is testing you to see if you seem repulsed by his physical affection or if you welcome more of it.

Solution: Touch him back! Keep strong eye contact when you touch him, as if giving him permission to be a little bolder. Don’t just smile though…master the “coy look” which is your body’s way of saying, “I know you like me. Why don’t you just admit it?”

4. He stares at you…especially when you’re not looking.

If you notice he has weak eye contact and yet seems to enjoy talking to you, then he’s struggling with confidence. He might avoid eye contact altogether or look at you for approximately two seconds and then look away—before any sexual tension can be created. But when he thinks you’re not looking he will stare at you…and that’s a definite signal that you’re the ONLY thing on his mind.

Solution: Stare back at him and smile, making sure he knows you caught him. Then, confront him playfully, asking him what he was thinking about. Sometimes a guy will “breakdown” and confess feelings if you are persistent and play along.

5. He keeps trying to impress you in a “platonic way.”

He may not be hitting on you out in the open but he sure is singing his own praises. What does a guy act like when he wants YOU to make the first move? He’s enthusiastic about his hobbies or his personal achievements or his career. He’s drawing attention to his good qualities, indicating he COULD make you very happy.

Solution: Keep egging him on, showing interest in all of his “personal best” topics. Then, pretend as if you have a moment of weakness and tell him that any woman would be lucky to have a guy like him. Lose your “friendly smile” but keep tight eye contact, as if you’re asking with your eyes for him to make a move.

If you feel really bold you could tilt your head and pretend as if he’s trying to kiss you and you’re going to kiss him back. If he doesn’t initiate a kiss then just ask him a question but keep the tilt. Tilt back to normal, pretending as if nothing happened.

Remember the goal is not to steal his thunder but to give him more opportunity—and more feelings of safety—so that he feels comfortable progressing in the relationship. He may have been burned by another woman before. So your objective should be to be more assertive in suggesting something (like getting him to talk about how he feels or going somewhere on a non-date outing) but to NOT pressure him into doing something romantic.

You may find that shy guys, and guys who are extra cautious for whatever other reason, tend to open up more when you send them more positive signals. They are far more likely to flirt and open up once they see you’re excited about the experience.

40 Flirty Texts That Men Absolutely Love

If you’re struggling to figure out what to say to your man to bring you closer together, I’ve put together a guide of 40 fun and flirty text messages that will spark a stronger and deeper desire in whatever man you use them with.

If you don’t know what to say to your man, use these “cut and paste” text messages from my free guide and watch how much he absolutely loves it!

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About The Author

Matthew Coast

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