It’s only natural to wonder, perhaps even worry, that the love between you and your partner won’t last a lifetime. It really makes you think and hum sad song lyrics like, “Tonight you’re mine completely…tonight the light of love is in your eyes…but will you love me tomorrow?”
It’s only natural to be afraid when you start thinking of worst case scenarios. But of course, the problem is that this is where needy behavior begins. When you start to worry, when you start to make every decision based on the fear of losing him, you lose your confidence. You lose the attraction he feels towards you because now that your actions are motivated by fear, you’re no longer being the cool and confident woman he fell in love with.
The answer is not to keep him at all costs and force him to stay with you. It’s not just to “think positively” either and hope for the best. The real way to cope with doubt and to plan for a lifelong happy marriage is to approach the situation realistically. Show each other mutual respect and plan for “forever” in what you say and do.
Here are four memorable quotes on building long-term marriages that will emphasize the most important points about keeping love alive.
1. “Anyone can be happy when times are good; the richer experience is to be happy when times are not.” -Susan Harris
Susan Harris, a TV comedy writer, should well know the secret to happiness. To simply choose to be happy. You might say that the entire concept of “Happily Ever After” is a choice. You can’t wait on life to give you a perfect love story. But you can choose to be happy and confident that the love with your spouse is real.
This attitude, this choice to be happy, is what will endear you to your partner. Happiness is much easier to live with than paranoia and mistrust. Your partner wants a source of positive energy, for the rest of his life, and so choosing happily ever after really does matter.
2. “You don’t know the first thing about love, because you don’t understand compromise.” -Patrick Marber
Playwright and screenwriter Patrick Marber has written many good quotes over the years but it’s hard to argue this is one of his best.
What is love, besides a relationship built on negotiation and compromise? Doing so requires mutual respect. If you demand love on your own terms, you’re bound to be disappointed by the reality of romance.
Romance is not magical, nor is it as absolute and flawless as we see in the movies or mainstream romance novels. Love in the real world is a delicate balance between two personalities that want similar things. Both partners have strong opinions and come from a different background.
For that reason, love will never be so spontaneously perfect. The successful relationship will be built on compromise, the willingness to try your partner’s way, and his willingness to try it your way the next time. It’s a perpetual negotiation, built on the idea of mutual respect.
You won’t always agree but you will always love each other deeply. That love will allow you to compromise, even if you don’t fully understand or agree with each other. Respect allows you to remain open-minded. Respect lets you put your partner’s happiness over your own, because making him happy makes you happy.
That’s one of the keys of a successful long-term relationship–compromise! Delicately balancing what he wants and what you want, as an independent person. True love is finding the right partner, a man worth compromising for because of the enormous respect he has for you!
3. “A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.” -Robert Quillen
Living with a person means a 100 percent chance of confrontation. There will be arguments, angry moments, and yes, probably some serious relationship stress. But there’s only one way to approach these problems. Forgive freely. Learn the value of forgiving, even if it’s at the expense of your ego. If you can’t forgive, and can’t forget, then you’re going to hold onto that hostility.
You can’t stubbornly demand your pride or your “right” while you’re also trying to make a marriage work. Marriage is a contract between two people, two independent lives coming together as one. It’s not just about compromising what you want – it’s also about letting go of petty little things that don’t matter in the long run.
Angry tone of voice, thoughtless mistakes, heated arguments, you have to let these things go. Sure, you can talk to your partner about what hurts your feelings, but after that, you have to let it go.
Your husband won’t be perfect, even if he seems like “the perfect guy.” He will disappoint you, frustrate you and hurt your feelings. But once he apologizes, IF he apologizes (believe me, not all men are good at that!) you have a choice to make. To be patient with him, to tolerate his bad habits, or to punish him. Punish him for hurting you so he’ll get the point!
Yeah, bad idea. Don’t punish him. A man will not respond well to this and will start to associate the marriage with all sorts of negativity. The best advice anyone could possibly give is to “forgive freely.” Find a man who truly loves and respects you and love him enough to forgive his errors. He’ll do the same for you and in that dynamic, you will find peace.
4. “We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.” -Sam Keen
Finally, accept the idea that perfection doesn’t exist – but you can perfectly fall in love with a man’s imperfections. Another way to say that would be to “Love his flaws.” It’s easy to love a man’s success, his victories, and his best days.
But can you love his flaws? Can you love him even when he’s at his lowest ebb? Believe me, it’s not easy and it may be impossible because some men’s “flaws” are monstrous. They’re unbearable to live with. And if you marry a narcissist you’ll find that out the hard way.
On the other hand, if a man still has a good heart and is still lovable – even when he makes a mistake or frustrates you on occasion – then you’ve truly found someone special. Someone whose flaws you can forgive and even love, because somehow these flaws speak to the strength of his overall character.
Marriage is not easy, true. But life is not easy. What makes life enjoyable and tons of fun is having the right attitude about it. Believing in your best friend…enjoying these wonderful moments. Forgiving your partner because he’s just too amazing to stay mad at! This right attitude is what ensures “forever” and the rest of your life. Because positivity is contagious and in the end, if you are happy and want to make him happy, a good man will never find a reason to leave you.
The 5 Word Phrase That Destroys a Man’s Love For You And Drives Him Out Of Your Life
There’s a simple 5 word phrase that will destroy any man’s love for you and drive him out of your life completely…
It usually comes out as an honest question when you want to connect with him…
But only serves to push him away and slowly kill your relationship from the inside out…
It can take a man who is filled with love and passion for you…
And make him feel cold, distant, and uninterested…
Have you figured out what it is yet?
Many women send this as a text message when they’re feeling insecure…
And then are confused why he suddenly pulls away and disappears completely…
Most of the women who ask it don’t even know how harmful it is…
Yet it can take a relationship that seems like it’s perfect…
A relationship where you feel loved, cared for, and like you’ve finally found “the one”…
And overnight, it can tear that relationship apart…
Leaving you confused, frustrated, and heartbroken…
If you don’t know what this simple yet seemingly innocent question is…
I want you to stop what you’re doing and go watch this video presentation that I put together for you at the link below…
Click here to watch the video now <<
My name is Matthew Coast and I’ve been teaching in the dating industry on since 2005…
I’ve helped hundreds of thousands of women, all over the world…
Get into relationships where they feel loved, seen, and cherished by the men they’re with…
When you click the link this link right here <<
I show you what this 5 word phrase is…
I’ll teach you about why men pull away, how to stop it from happening…
And how to attract the man you want…
Into a relationship where you’re loved and adored and treated like a priority…
No matter how painful things have been in your past…
You can attract a great man and have a great relationship…
Just click the link on your screen and the watch the video right now…
If you’re struggling with men pulling away from you…
If you’re tired of giving everything to a relationship and only being taken for granted…
And if you’re ready to have a man see you as a woman that he wants to be with forever…
