When it comes to flirty texting, there’s a lot that can go wrong, but also go right. What are the rules of sending a flirty message?
In that period of time after we’ve met someone, but before we take it up to the next level, is the time when we text him feverishly. When you are at this really exciting stage where you are trying to get to know him and see if they are ready to go deeper with your relationship, the text message becomes this essential tool. You will spend more time texting than actually hanging out with them at this stage, which is why learning to flirt in the right ways is essential.
It can seem like a lot of pressure to send a message that’s flirty, but not come on too strong that you turn them away, but you also need to understand some of the simple methods to sending flirty messages in the right context.
Make It Sound Like You
This is probably the most important piece of advice when it comes to sending flirty messages. Rather than spending a lot of time trying to create some flirtatious persona that actually doesn’t match the reality, you’ve got to not overthink it.
You can send a variety of flirty messages or pick-up lines, but the goal of a text message is to set up anticipation, so when they see you next, you can easily step back into the conversation as if you were texting a few minutes ago. This is so important when you are trying to build some form of relationship.
Making it sound like you can be tough, but it’s about making sure you get the balance right between being friendly and making sure your personality shines through by not overthinking what you’re sending. Because if you’re not an overly flirtatious person, flirtatious messages may only set him up for disappointment when you do finally meet up. You do you!
When you have started a back-and-forth with the other person, knowing when to increase the dial can be difficult to gauge. Make sure that you play cool, but also think about those little creative things:
- Make them laugh. This is a great flirtatious tactic. If you have a rip-roaring sense of humor and they don’t, they might not be worth your time, so if you want to impress him and make him a bit more interested while you both relax into the roles will work wonders.
- Making observations. A clever observation that makes them think about something in a different way will certainly ensure that they pay attention to you.
Creativity is tough but there are always plenty of resources that we can help you with.
Start Off With Subtlety
You need to get the ball rolling, and you can certainly make the first move via text, but you’ve got to play it cool here. Don’t make it look like you’re trying too hard, because one of the biggest mistakes people make is sending a message and then sending another one literally 5 minutes later because they haven’t had a reply.
It’s better for you to relax and send a message when it feels right. You should make sure that it’s a natural dialogue, which is when flirting can become easier. If you spent hours trying to think of the perfect line, is it actually worth your time? Flirting should be a logical progression of two people that are into each other, so consider the following:
- Don’t always be the first person to text. Playing it cool is very important, and this is a lovely little test to make sure that they are into you as much as you are into them.
- Don’t wait days to text them. Everybody has their phones on them, and a simple line, even if you are too busy, will be enough in the short term. And remember, if they are happy to engage in a conversation and you feel they’re worth it, you are going to dedicate some time to them anyway.
- Don’t try too hard in your messages. You might spend so much time agonizing over every word. Instead, think about it as being a logical extension of who you are.
- Text him as if you were texting a friend. Have your emojis in proportion, rather than thinking they will like specific emojis. You have to remember it’s just as much about being comfortable in yourself rather than trying too hard to please him.
When to Turn Up the Dial on Flirting
If you spend time getting to know him, and you’ve overcome some of the subtleties that can be missed by a text, you can start to increase the intensity. You can be playful- keep it light, and if you have any concerns that anything will be misinterpreted, it’s always a good idea to have a wink face emoticon just in case!
And if you are confident that he is into you as you are into him after laying the groundwork, for example, checking in on them when unwell, or asking their opinion of a new movie or activity, you can start to drop a few hints. For example, you could tell them how attractive they were the last time you saw them. You could also make them a little bit excited by telling them that you just got out of the shower, which is such a simple thing (after all, we all need to shower) but it provides that little spark in their mind that may speed up their responses.
Sign Off Strong
As tempting as it can be to keep replying to people, we’ve got lives to lead! So if you need to stop the conversation, it’s always important to make sure that they are wanted at the end. You can leave an opening to pick it up another time or tell them what you’re going to do, and if you are meeting up soon, you can tell them you can’t wait to see them.
Ultimately, being flirtatious is not just about sending really strong sexy messages. It’s about using this as a tactic to ensure they are worth your time. Pick-up lines can be a dime a dozen, but if you really want to build a solid relationship with someone and they are worth it, it’s always about making sure that you keep it natural by, very simply, being yourself.