Cutting an ex off after a breakup is no walk in the park. Add in the no-contact rule, and it can quickly become a battle between your head and your heart. Your heart might have a hard time putting away all the memories you’ve shared and the unwavering love you have. Your mind, however, might hold you accountable for following the no-contact rule.
If you’re here, chances are that you’re struggling with the no-contact rule. You’ve probably familiarized yourself with how to know if no contact is working and how to know if he misses you during no contact, and maybe you’re toying with the possibility that it’s not working at all.
There are two things I’ll say about that:
- There is a chance that having no contact will not work in getting your ex back, but if you’re healing and moving on through the process, you still walk away a winner.
- Sometimes, we make the mistake of putting a deadline on things. You can’t predict what he is thinking after two weeks of no contact–some partners might reach out after a few days, while others might take months to process the breakup.
Depending on how your relationship ended, a couple of weeks might not be enough time for your ex to truly experience life without you or to start to want you back. You want your ex to come back when he is ready and willing–not because you need him to.
That being said, let’s discuss a few signs that show your period of no contact is not working:
He’s Moved On
An ex that has moved on is one that most likely won’t respond to no contact. Allowing yourself to linger on the feelings you have for an unattainable ex will only make you suffer in the long run.
Just because he’s moved on does not mean you should quit the no-contact rule. Remember, the no-contact rule can help you move on and heal. If he realizes his new relationship is nothing but a rebound, that may be good news–but you’ll have benefitted from going no-contact, regardless.
The Cut Is Too Deep
If the relationship ended on a terrible note that hurt both parties, chances are slim that no contact will work. A relationship beyond repair will most likely remain unfixable.
Your ex might not be able to forgive you for wrongdoings or move past issues that led to the relationship’s demise. Your ex may be ready to try again down the road, but if you implement having zero contact and take it as an opportunity to focus on yourself, you may not even want him back when that time comes.
He Expresses Negative Feelings
There’s a chance your ex might meet you with negative or hostile responses at the end of your no-contact period. Your ex needs time to see the relationship you two shared in a different light and to reflect positively on you as a partner.
Unfortunately, there’s no fixed timeline on when that can and will happen–some people need more time to cool off, but if your ex doesn’t show a change of heart as time goes on, it’s safe to assume he isn’t ready.
When you’re ready to begin aligning your values and needs with how you navigate relationships, the experts at Commitment Connection are here to help! You deserve the very best, and that includes a man who knows what a catch he’s got while he has it.