You have a dilemma—you are ready and want love, but you hate attention. You want someone to notice you, but shrink from the spotlight. People say that if you love yourself, love will come to you. Figuring out how to get a boyfriend is hard enough, but how do you get a boyfriend if you are shy?
One way to get attention without having to put yourself out there is to let your appearance do the talking for you. Whether you want to know how to get a country guy to like you or how to attract an urbanite mogul, there are ways to be yourself and still catch their eye. Getting a boyfriend isn’t difficult–what’s hard is attracting the one you want.
How to Catch His Eye
Invest in Your Personal Style
Whether it’s discovering your Kibbe Type or dressing for your zodiac rising sign, find what style suits you. Don’t only consider what is physically flattering, but also what makes you feel confident. We’re way beyond Cosmo comparing our bodies to overripe fruit. Experiment with your look and try styles you always thought were better suited for “other” women. You know, the ones who were carefree. The fun ones. The sexy ones. Why can’t that be you?
I used to dress in flowy boho clothing. I’m tall and lean, so I assumed I had to wear the Blake Lively uniform of Malibu Chic. Then one day, I decided to wear an outfit that was black with sharp edges and a tight waist. Wearing those clothes made me feel more powerful and confident than I ever felt swimming in patterned fabric. Even if it feels like a costume for a bit, try it out and see what feelings arise when you experiment with your style.
Carry Yourself With Confidence
Now that you are donning the outfit of your confident alter-ego, you need to own it. No one has to know this is your first time wearing heels, and if they do know, they don’t care because you’re laughing it off and brimming with swagger.
When you feel empowered, you become a beacon. You could be wearing a blazer, a little black dress, or a potato sack—if you’re confident, you’ll turn heads. Confidence doesn’t mean being the loudest person in the room, either. It’s knowing your worth, keeping your shoulders down and back, and allowing yourself to be drawn to people who are positive and motivated. Remember that you were invited to every room you walk into—people want you here.
Confidence turns heads and catches the eyes of people who carry themselves with the same sureness. When you feel confident and empowered, people with the same energy will be drawn to you.
Be Yourself and Stay Relaxed
When you’re approached by Mr. Right (or someone who you hope will turn out to be him) don’t overthink it. You’ve caught his attention, and it’s not your job to keep it. He is approaching you because he wants your attention, so relax! He’s taking initiative because that’s what a proactive, mature man does.
Enjoy his company, laugh at his jokes if they make you smile, and ask questions you’re actually curious about. Exploring with your style and empowering yourself does not mean you need to be an entirely different person. It is simply to be a signal to the world that you’ve done the work for yourself, and you’re stepping out.