Whether you just want to spend some time with a guy or you want to eventually build up a serious relationship with him, you have to start by hanging out. But what happens if he’s not initiating interaction? You shouldn’t just wait for him to make the first move or resort to tactics on how to get your crush to ask you out (though these can be useful to know, too!).
You can ask him out yourself and you should if you really want to form a bond with him. If you’re wondering how to ask a guy to hang out, here are some of my tips to help you secure a date—whether it’s friendly or romantic.
Asking a Guy to Hang Out
It can seem intimidating to ask a guy to hang out, especially if you’re pre-dispositioned with the notion that it’s always the guy who should act first. But stop mulling over the question, “should I ask out my crush?” and just go for it! But before you breach the topic, here are some things to keep in mind.
Gauge His Interest
If you’re asking a guy to hang out with you with the goal to build a foundation for a romantic relationship, first gauge his interest. Check whether he may be interested in this path, as well. This will help you tailor your moves and language, and allow you to control the situation to achieve your desired results.
Don’t Be Pressured to Make It Romantic
Asking a guy to hang out comes with a lot of pressure because it’s always assumed to have underlying romantic motives. Even when it does, don’t be pressed to make it too sweet. A hang-out can simply be an innocent hang-out where you spend time with a guy enjoying each other’s company.
Invite Some Common Friends
If you or your crush is feeling a bit awkward hanging out just by yourselves, put a bit of a cushion by inviting some mutual friends. This will allow you to get to know each other while being in the comfort of familiar faces who can even help you let loose and show your true self.
Consider What He Likes
When you’re planning a hang-out, consider both your and your date’s likes. Think about what you have in common and plan your interaction around that. This way, you have something you can both look forward to regardless, and it’s a great catalyst to strengthen your bond.
Make It Easier for Him to Decide
While it’s tempting to make yourself come off as cool and flexible, inviting a guy to hang out with an open-ended plan might make it difficult for him to say yes because he’ll be coming into the event blind. Be ready with options or a plan, so that all he has to do is decide whether he says yes or no.
Is It a Turn-Off if a Girl Asks a Guy to Hang Out?
Many women hesitate to ask a guy to hang out because they think it might be a turn-off—that a guy might feel discouraged being the one on the receiving end since they all want to have the sort of upper hand in the relationship. But this isn’t necessarily true. In fact, a lot of guys appreciate not having to make the first move, and they welcome it as a refreshing gesture to be the one to be asked to hang out.
That said, there are still a handful of men who scoff at the thought and grasp on outdated ideals, and if the guy you’re asking out is that way, you might be better off with someone else, anyway.
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