Many people find expressing their emotions difficult, but this is more common with men who might perceive vulnerability as a weakness or want to avoid opening themselves up to potential heartache.
Still, real, truthful communications are essential, whether you need to know how to ask a guy if he likes you indirectly or want to discuss the future of your relationship. Guys typically find it easier to talk about thoughts over feelings, but emotional maturity is key to having a genuine heart-to-heart and establishing the intimacy and trust that is only possible when you are both honest.
Verbalizing and Labeling Feelings
The first step is to accept that we all have emotions–if your partner, friend, or date is struggling, they might be trying to block their feelings or stifle their true emotions.
What do you do if a boy likes you but isn’t clear about how he feels or what that might mean for a future relationship? Try creating a safe space where he feels secure enough to talk about his feelings without judgment, confrontation, or interruption and can express how he feels about you in his own time.
We often sense a vibe or pick up on a bad mood but don’t know how to help or when to respond because a guy isn’t prepared to share what’s going on in their head. By verbalizing your feelings or thinking about what factors or situations are causing bubbling stress, worry, fear, anxiety, or resentment, you can teach emotional vocabulary some guys aren’t experienced in.
How to Share Feelings With a Guy
I mentioned the contrast between thoughts and feelings–men are generally better able to express their thoughts than their emotional responses.
A guy might say they’ve had a bad day because they were late for something, but that doesn’t explain why they’re still overthinking it later in the evening. In this case, it could be that he feels embarrassed at turning up late or perceives that his colleagues are annoyed with him and is internalizing that embarrassment or disappointment.
Working through what we feel and why we feel it is an important journey, particularly in the context of a relationship in which we rely on each other for compassion, empathy, and emotional support. Using your everyday messages and conversations to demonstrate the emotions behind a thought models openness, and doesn’t necessarily have to be deep, meaningful, or philosophical!
For example, if you want to know how to tell if he likes you through texting, you could use the above illustration to express your emotions and gauge his response to see what he does to support you at the end of a tough day.
Discussing Emotions With a Date or Partner
One of the fundamental reasons women tend to be better at emotional discussions is that they are more descriptive and receptive to nuance. However, feelings don’t need to be complex and might be summed up in one simple word, such as:
If you’re finding it hard to explain your feelings to a guy or get him to tell you what’s going on under the surface, labeling an underlying emotion can be useful. This takes away the intensity and helps us rationalize why we’re responding in a certain way.
Ultimately, if you want to discuss your emotions or encourage a date to reciprocate, it can take practice, and trust, especially if we’re feeling burdened by lots of different feelings. However, making this a natural part of your conversation and being open and honest yourself sets the tone for supportive, non-judgmental listening that can be the beginning of a life-long connection.