Are you trying to draw your crush out in a text conversation? Do you notice he’s kind of distant lately? Maybe he’s giving one-word replies. Or he’s just being polite and leaving the same comments. Nothing seems to bring this guy to life!
In that case, it’s time to try something different.
One problem I’ve noticed lately is that too many people misunderstand the whole point of texting in the first place. They either send boring texts that nobody wants to read, or they try too hard and type way too much when it’s not necessary.
Good texting should feel more natural, like an actual conversation.
So let’s assume that the previous topics you tried just didn’t work. No sense in trying something you know is going to fall flat. So forget asking him the same questions or trying to discuss familiar conversations.
Instead, it’s time to start thinking of more creative and fun ways to engage him in a dialog.
Let’s consider 10 text messages that work and why guys respond to them. (Hint: Because they love the way these texts make them feel!)
1. The Sexy Visual Text: “I was just in the shower when…OR I love when my roommate leaves, that means I can walk around naked for an hour!”
Men cannot resist the sexual visual test, especially if you try to make it just a little innocent. It’s sneaky of you to put that visual in his mind. But he definitely enjoys it and then wonders for a minute, if you’re thinking what he’s thinking. And of course, the answer is yes!
2. The Fun Factoid: “Did you know that a female praying mantis bites the head off her lover during mating…OR Fun fact about me: I am a surfer girl!
Guys like factoids, either in general (as long as they’re short and interesting, like stuff you might see shared on Facebook) or about you specifically. He thinks of your personal factoids as clues into your personality. He will remember this information about you, if he likes you, and may even try to use it as a way to get closer to you.
3. The Subtle Invitation: “I got to go with my family on a camping trip. Wish you were here…OR I have to go to a meet and greet for work. Free drinks, if any freeloaders are interested.”
These are fun texts, especially if the guy is already into you. You can either put the idea of inviting him somewhere – but then not actually invite him. (As in, inviting him to something he couldn’t possibly attend) Or, you could actually invite him by way of a subtle invitation. Something like “I am going to this old timey saloon Friday. I wish I had a buddy to square dance with!”
Basically, you just stop short of saying, “Do you want to come?” And he might just summon the courage to invite himself.
4. The Sweet Friendsy Text: “I’ve always appreciated [that thing!] about you. I hope you know that…OR Thank you, you have always been such a good friend.”
Consider this a “Friends” moment, like the old 90s TV show. Every time a character said something sweet the audience awwed. Well, guys like those kinds of texts too. Just try to keep your sentiments subtle and sincere. Nothing too over the top or cringy.
Remember, guys do like to be praised for the effort they put forth. So if you take the time to appreciate something he has actually done (or posted on social media, or talked about with people) then that’s something worth mentioning.
5. The Compliment Text: “I’ve always admired your eyes…OR I love your wacky sense of humor. You say what everyone’s thinking!”
In like manner, giving a sincere compliment works just as well, but only if the guy is trying to be noticed. So if the guy’s been working out, take notice. If the guy has deep, soulful eyes let him know that.
6. The Cheeky Flirt: “Oh stop pretending like you don’t miss me. And stop thinking about me in the bubble bath just because I said it!”
This is a bold and cheeky kind of flirt text, but if the guy likes you, and you have that kind of playful personality, you can get away with lines like these. You basically just flirt with him but reverse the perspective, making it seem like he’s the one always hitting on you. Works like a charm on shy guys who don’t want to be too forward.
7. The Positive Jealousy Text: “My friends all think you’re the hottest guy among the lot…OR I think that rude girl at the DMV is just flirting with you. But you’re mine!”
Guys don’t mind positive jealousy so much. Like knowing your friends think he’s hot, or even the idea that you have to fight off other women from stealing him. It makes him feel good and flatters his ego. On the other hand, being jealous of other women only adds to his stress.
Use that sort of positive jealousy to get a big reaction and virtual laugh from him.
8. The Help Me Text: “I need your opinion on something…OR Don’t get a big head, but I think I need you to come with me and help me choose a rental car.”
Don’t confuse a help me text with a “PLEASE HELP!” emergency. Guys can’t handle that much drama! But believe it or not, guys are HARD-WIRED to do women favors. All the more so if he has a secret crush on you. It appeals to his instincts to provide for you.
9. The Hold Me Text: “I just need a hug right now…OR I just want to go on one freakin date after a year of Quarantine!”
The Hold Me text also gets a big reaction. As long as you say it in jest or in a happy way, asking for a physical response (being hugged, shaking hands, dancing, or simply being with someone on a date) is a nice way to make him want more intimacy with you.
10. The Lemme Tell You a Story Text: “So you’ll never believe what happened at the big family reunion (emoticon face) OR I had the craziest dream last night and you were there!”
Finally, there’s the old “lemme tell you…” which never fails to intrigue a guy. Guys love stories. They especially like setups to stories as pertains to you, him, and other people you know. Even simple stories. But dramatic stories are good too.
Just remember to:
• Keep things SHORT
• Keep things a little extreme or exaggerated, because you’re not writing a book, just trying to get an emotional reaction!
• And wait for his responses so he can feel involved
As we’ve discussed the best way to get him to respond to a text is to get him emotionally involved and give him a chance to respond. But always make sure to focus on the positive so he will associate you with fun conversation.
Text him this to trigger his desire to chase you…
Did you know that you can trigger a man’s hormones through your text messages?
It’s true. How you communicate with a man can actually release different hormones in his body.
One of the most important ones is testosterone because that’s what makes him CHASE you, pursue you, and invest in you so that he gets “hooked” and desires something more with you.
Want to trigger this in your man?
Talk soon,
Matthew Coast
P.S. You can actually trigger a “cocktail of emotions” inside a man that makes him feel like he can’t get you out of his mind and even feel addicted to you, if you text him a certain way.
