Have you ever had an “instant nemesis?” Someone who seems to dislike you almost immediately? It’s not like you try to go out and offend people. But very often you notice that people seem to distance themselves from you. Or they make mean comments. Or maybe they just don’t respond to your invitations. Maybe they even ignore you!
The problem might be that you have some unconscious habits that bother people. Don’t worry, many people have the same habits and just as many are unaware of what they do. They don’t even think about it. They just do these little things and unknowingly offend people or at least put them on the defensive.
In this article, we’re going to list these habits that make people dislike you and then discuss ways to reverse that dynamic towards the end.
1. Taking up the whole conversation and not letting anyone else talk.
Sometimes this is a nervous habit, and certainly not malicious. But try to remember that not all eyes are on you, especially if it’s a group. People do find it obnoxious to dominate a conversation and not let anyone else speak. Speak a little bit then let someone else speak. Follow the natural flow of discussion. You have nothing to prove.
2. Asking too many questions too soon.
Even though it might feel perfectly natural to ask new people questions to learn about them, many people consider asking a series of questions too invasive. Remember that natural conversation involves questions, statements, and preferably a shared dialog between people. Too many questions at once, even if they’re not personal, can seem like an interrogation.
3. Revealing too much personal information about yourself way too soon.
It’s human nature to want to bond with somebody you like. But try to remember that sharing a lot of new information with a person can overwhelm them. They might start to think you’re too brainy, or too unstable, or just some other negative quality because – unfortunately – most people don’t like it when we start dropping TMI bombs in the first conversation. Space out all your topics and confessions.
4. Too many frowns or straight faces – not enough smiling.
Although it’s hard to smile when you’re nervous many people mistake that nervous energy as unfriendly behavior. Or at the very least, you make them uncomfortable because you project discomfort yourself. This is why it’s important to smile more and try to keep eye contact for a longer period of time, to make that friendly connection.
5. Bragging or humble bragging.
Resist any urge to boost yourself up because most people do find it irritating. No one likes a braggart. It’s better to simply talk about what you know, or what’s interesting, rather than draw more attention to your own accomplishments. Also, “humble bragging” or self-deprecating just to devote more attention to yourself doesn’t make enjoyable conversation.
6. Self-centered conversations.
You don’t have to brag to be self-centered. Self-centered simply means you ignore what other people are saying, and never ask questions, but instead talk more about yourself. Maybe this works on Instagram, I dunno! But it’s a terrible idea when you’re trying to make new friends. Always remember to be interactive and include people in the conversation.
7. Having an always-negative attitude.
It’s understandable why people are negative and focus on the dark side of life. Bad things happen. It’s scary. Times are scary. Life as we know it is changing.
But you must always find the positive in life. Not only does focusing on the positive make you happier, but it also makes you more friends. It helps you become more successful. It just makes life easier and better! So try to check the number of times you say negative things.
8. Being a flake.
It’s hard to prevent accidents and freak occurrences from happening. But that’s why it’s always a good idea to avoid making promises that you can’t keep. Promise only what you know you can do. Don’t promise results if you think something could prevent them from happening.
Friends do tend to notice when you fail to deliver on promises, or when you bail on them, or just disappoint them in some way when they were counting on you. Being a flake is a big deal and will compromise what could be a great friendship.
9. Having a mean-streak.
We’re not just talking abusive, but even backbiting or giving false compliments is a nasty thing to do. While you might know people that get away with doing this, don’t try it yourself. More often than not it costs people their friends. Friends who are on the receiving end of all the nasty comments will wise up and realize that it’s not an equal friendship. Avoid making insults or hurting feelings…that’s just what friends do.
10. Being a perpetual victim.
Finally, try to stop framing stories in a negative way – as in friends or family that attack you, or how some segment of society is holding you back. In other words, don’t blame other people for your life.
We all suffer, we all are victims of injustice from time to time. But complaining to your friends about everyone who’s ever wronged is just not a good way to make friends!
At some point, we all have to accept responsibility for our lives – past, present, and future. Even if someone has done you wrong, don’t focus on it.
Remember, many of these behaviors are involuntary. You may not even be conscious of what you’re saying, how you’re saying it, or how you come across. If you want better relationships with people, try to speak more consciously of the problem.
Now that you’re aware of what you do without thinking, try to think before you converse. Stop yourself if you notice you’re starting the habit again. Remain quiet for a few seconds and then change the course of the conversation, if necessary.
Soon enough, you will eliminate these negative conversation traits and will start to notice people trusting you more and projecting more positive energy. If you’re ready to throw out those bad habits that make people not like you check out our new article on how do you get a guy to like you.
The 5 Word Phrase That Destroys a Man’s Love For You And Drives Him Out Of Your Life
There’s a simple 5 word phrase that will destroy any man’s love for you and drive him out of your life completely…
It usually comes out as an honest question when you want to connect with him…
But only serves to push him away and slowly kill your relationship from the inside out…
It can take a man who is filled with love and passion for you…
And make him feel cold, distant, and uninterested…
Have you figured out what it is yet?
Many women send this as a text message when they’re feeling insecure…
And then are confused why he suddenly pulls away and disappears completely…
Most of the women who ask it don’t even know how harmful it is…
Yet it can take a relationship that seems like it’s perfect…
A relationship where you feel loved, cared for, and like you’ve finally found “the one”…
And overnight, it can tear that relationship apart…
Leaving you confused, frustrated, and heartbroken…
If you don’t know what this simple yet seemingly innocent question is…
I want you to stop what you’re doing and go watch this video presentation that I put together for you at the link below…
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My name is Matthew Coast and I’ve been teaching in the dating industry on since 2005…
I’ve helped hundreds of thousands of women, all over the world…
Get into relationships where they feel loved, seen, and cherished by the men they’re with…
When you click the link this link right here <<
I show you what this 5 word phrase is…
I’ll teach you about why men pull away, how to stop it from happening…
And how to attract the man you want…
Into a relationship where you’re loved and adored and treated like a priority…
No matter how painful things have been in your past…
You can attract a great man and have a great relationship…
Just click the link on your screen and the watch the video right now…
If you’re struggling with men pulling away from you…
If you’re tired of giving everything to a relationship and only being taken for granted…
And if you’re ready to have a man see you as a woman that he wants to be with forever…
