If you were to make a list of “must have” characteristics of the perfect man, what would you write down?
If you haven’t done so already, I’d suggest you do it, if for no other reason than curiosity. Go ahead and make a list of MUST HAVE qualities that you want to see. He should have all or at least most qualities. If you want, you can substitute an abstract quality for something more specific, like “He must be nice to his mother” or whatever you wish.
I feel making a list like this is a great learning tool, because deep down, even before we meet “the right one”, we do kind of get a vision of who he is.
Think about it: you know what you’re attracted to. You know the kind of men you find attractive and the kind of gestures that he would have to do to make you feel loved.
Just because you haven’t met him yet doesn’t mean you don’t know what you’re looking for. And the better you know exactly what you’re looking for, the better the relationship will be.
How is that so? Isn’t it less romantic to plan out the right type of guy and just follow your heart?
Ask yourself this: is being married to a narcissist or psychopath romantic? Of course not! But that’s the kind of risk you take when you date exclusively by the heart and when you ignore your conscience, your sense of reason, and even dismiss all the warnings friends and family are giving you.
Deep down we ALL have good instincts. When we feel doubt there’s a reason. Our subconscious mind may even sense something that our logical mind is not quite seeing, something that doesn’t “feel” right.
This is one reason why I say, make a list. Make a list of what your perfect man should be like. Hold him to a high moral standard, someone equal with you, someone who embodies the same values that you do. Someone worthy of your parents, worthy of your family and friends who are the best people you’ve ever known in life.
If you make your list and follow it through, you will find the marriage you want and the one you deserve. No mistakes or “starter marriages” needed.
In fact, I’ll help out by creating a sort of template list that you can read and then base your own answers on. Here are 8 husband suggestions that most psychology and marriage counselors might volunteer.
Do they match up with your list?
1. Have a Man Who Pays Attention to You
He listens closely. He doesn’t just listen to cues or nod, but he actually listens and remembers information! Listening always helps in avoiding arguments and being a good emotional provider.
2. Have a Man Who Goes Out of His Way to Make You Happy.
There’s something very endearing about a man who steps out of his comfort zone just to make you smile. Since most men gradually do less to please you over time, be very wary of men who barely lift a finger to please you. Be amazed at the man that always sacrifices his own comfort to make sure you’re happy.
3. Have a Man Who Supports You in Whatever You Choose to Do in Life
You’ll meet plenty of handsome and sexy guys who want to control you is laugh at your dreams. Or who want to help you, as long as they still make more money than you. These guys are common. A man who wants you to be your best, and helps you achieve your dreams, is truly someone rare and beautiful.
4. Have a Man Who is Kind to Your Family
While a lot of men will “fake it” to a degree, a real man embraces the opportunity to meet your parents and appreciate who they are. In fact, meeting your entire family will help a man better understand your family history and who you really are inside. He should jump at the chance to make these acquaintances his friends.
5. Have a Man Who Enjoys Having Fun
There are some brilliant brooders in the world, no question. But no matter how amazing he is in art or charm, if he’s never happy with you or with the world, it won’t be a very fun marriage. A man who can have fun in any situation—even when times are rough—will help make your life a little brighter.
6. Have a Man Who is Mature About Handling Disagreements
No one’s going to make it through a marriage without enduring lots of arguing. The question is how mature is he? Can he get over emotional conflicts easily? Is he mature enough to admit when he does something wrong? Narcissistic guys are sometimes funny and fun to argue with at first…but that wears off fast. In time, you will appreciate a man who values your feelings and who wants to settle arguments rather than keep them fired up for years on end.
7. Have a Man Who Enjoys Providing for You
A man is just born to provide for his family. Now that may or may not be talking about money. A man has resources. When he meets the woman of his dreams he gives freely. He enjoys giving. Whether that’s working hard, or being a father, or making you laugh, or giving you affection, whatever it is, he loves doing it and will do it for the rest of your lives. In contrast, a man who begrudgingly provides and who sighs every time you want something, will make for a miserable marriage mate.
8. Have a Man Who is Emotionally Mature
Emotional maturity is not just rational. It’s vulnerable. It’s expressive! It’s the ability of a man to give you a genuine compliment without sarcasm. To confide in you his fears and worries. To read you a love letter he wrote and mean every word of it. When he notices you’re upset, he wants to talk it over with you. There are plenty of handsome men out there who are emotionally stunted. Living with them might be possible…but it’s not nearly as fun as living with a man who is emotionally open and healthy.
Create your own list of good qualities and try to check off each characteristic before committing to a guy. Don’t settle for someone who ignites a spark. Fall in love with a man who goes the distance.
The 5 Word Phrase That Destroys a Man’s Love For You And Drives Him Out Of Your Life
There’s a simple 5 word phrase that will destroy any man’s love for you and drive him out of your life completely…
It usually comes out as an honest question when you want to connect with him…
But only serves to push him away and slowly kill your relationship from the inside out…
It can take a man who is filled with love and passion for you…
And make him feel cold, distant, and uninterested…
Have you figured out what it is yet?
Many women send this as a text message when they’re feeling insecure…
And then are confused why he suddenly pulls away and disappears completely…
Most of the women who ask it don’t even know how harmful it is…
Yet it can take a relationship that seems like it’s perfect…
A relationship where you feel loved, cared for, and like you’ve finally found “the one”…
And overnight, it can tear that relationship apart…
Leaving you confused, frustrated, and heartbroken…
If you don’t know what this simple yet seemingly innocent question is…
I want you to stop what you’re doing and go watch this video presentation that I put together for you at the link below…
Click here to watch the video now <<
My name is Matthew Coast and I’ve been teaching in the dating industry on since 2005…
I’ve helped hundreds of thousands of women, all over the world…
Get into relationships where they feel loved, seen, and cherished by the men they’re with…
When you click the link this link right here <<
I’ll show you what this 5 word phrase is…
I’ll teach you about why men pull away, how to stop it from happening…
And how to attract the man you want…
Into a relationship where you’re loved and adored and treated like a priority…
No matter how painful things have been in your past…
You can attract a great man and have a great relationship…
Just click the link on your screen and the watch the video right now…
If you’re struggling with men pulling away from you…
If you’re tired of giving everything to a relationship and only being taken for granted…
And if you’re ready to have a man see you as a woman that he wants to be with forever…
Click this link to watch my video right now <<
I am wanting to meet a mature man for companionship
Good! That’s what I teach about attracting!
Do real men exist? I guess as I’ve worked on me ….i just haven’t met him yet
Hi had all those good qualities in my late husband,
Now….it’s going to get real all over again.
Will just date if
the right man does surface.
I’ve worked on myself already. I’ve learned alot how men think. Always want to learn more!
I am with a good man, but he doesn’t want to have any disputes or argue; therefore he won’t speak against me or voice his own feelings. He’s afraid he will upset me and he says it’s not worth it because once you say something you can’t take it back. My issue with that is I don’t have a clue what his thoughts or feelings are – he speaks from his head not his heart. That really bothers me and I don’t know how to handle it, or what to do about it. I don’t feel comfortable expressing myself if he’s not fully expressing his needs or wants. Can you help with this?
In my opinion this is avoiding conflict to keep harmony. My ex does/did that. It does not work because you are less and less connected
Tina and Rosa i was also married to a man who would never express his feelings though i knew something was wrong. I just felt so disconnected. We finally divorced. Very true Rosa!
I had that experience too.
Maybe ask what he thinks about movies. What he would do in those different situations eg. (Abort a baby or adopt or keep it).
Listen to his conversation with others what he says. Dig deeper ask are you afraid I’ll break up with you if you express yourself so you don’t want to rock the boat and end up being rejected. Is this learnt behavior from mum and dad. Is it me do I nit pick so it’s better not to say anything cause I can’t handle the truth when it’s told to me.
I met mine and I love him ❤️ he posses all the 8 qualities,
I want companion
Me and my man split up but I can feel he wants to come back. He has no voice to tell me
My man sounds like you want him back yourself if so have a heart to heart with him where your at and your needs are make him feel safe so he can open up and share. By being venerable yourself first.
I found mine again and he does all of them and more
I found mine again and he does all of them and more and I Love him for that
I think it’s “I can’t be friends”
I am 78 yrs. Widowed for 17 and never beenninva relationship in that space. Now I find I am attracted to youngere men ..up to 20 yrs younger. Some not bothered by numbers but the one I really like seems to be.
What do you think. I am young at heart vibrant outgoing and told I am funny and charming. Is it too late for me?
I have also found myself attracted to someone much younger.16 years difference. We compliment each other. We challenge each other to achieve our goals and encourage each other when the other is feeling weak and hopeless. When we are together we work as a team, sharing to complete dinner with little to no verbal communications needed. We have the same sense of humour. Age really is just a number. I was hesitant at first because of the age difference but he was stubborn and didn’t give up. He kept treating me with respect and kindness. He showed me how it would be if we were in a relationship.
When you’re 75 or 80 if u make it to that age do u think he will still have eyes & be there for u as ur caregiver or will he look for greener pastures when ur hair is gray & u have many wrinkles.. something to think about before u get there.
I thought I had that man but I found out he was cheater a liar and an abuser after 4 years of marriage. I want a man with these qualities. I want someone I can communicate openly with and someone who can be totally honest with me. Where is he.
I’m 45 and dateing a 36 yr old everything is fine except being able to be intimate more often he’s an hr away and will not give up his own appartment lol. He’s mentioned moving intogethter but it’s not happened.
I wonder, if infact he is emotionally selfish, not wanting to give up his flat? Or, I’d he waiting for you to move to him, and make all the Decisions? Decisions should be joint and discussed. He’s talked about moving in, who raised It? Keep a little of you in reserve, please do not chase. Sit and wait a while, you are the wise one. Being in love and keen is wonderful, but do not let him take that as being needy. Sorry if that offends not meant to. In my relationship, I feel it is me that makes all the sacrifices and giving up. I would not want you to be the same. Love is more than physical attraction, word flapping is no good, you need actions, not words.
Scare city pull back until you are a priority in his life.
Told a guy I’m really interested in that there were some red flags bout him and now he’s ghosted me… I really liked him too. Just didn’t want to sugar coat anything…. Now I don’t know how to proceed. Just waiting game now– I suppose.
You did well to be transparent .
Sounds like you hit the nail on the head and he’s running for cover instead of working through the issues. Why try and make it happen if you know there’s red flags better to cut your loses than get more attached he him only to have to deattach yourself later on more painfully than if you do it now.
I’ve been dating the same man for four years and his mother and sister have interfered with him seeing me and telling him lies about me. What can I do?
Ask him to sick up for you and fight for your honor either your a team or your not and that you won’t play second fiddle to them. And address them as a couple and show them you’s are united and won’t be pulled apart. And if he can’t stick up for you now what kind of husband and father will he be. Kids need protection from bullies and mums need to be backed up dads against unruly teenagers he’s either got your back or he doesn’t
I haven’t met him yet but he has all of the good qualities..he has been on a contracted job far away for a while now..I’m waiting for the right time from him to tell he is at home & safe..then will will finally meet
My ex said he loved me years ago was never really with him then he then found me years after was with him for nearly 2 years never showing much love too How do you get your ex back if he says he will get back to you in time yet I think he’s with someone else since & has said he isn’t it’s so heartbreaking gets all jumpy if you ask him most questions about anything lately he was never like that before he wants most things only he’s way too any help would really appreciate it thank’s?
Doesn’t sound like there’s any trust or true love. Sounds like your lonely and desperate for company and putting up with utter nonsense. Time to move on and find someone that will appreciate you and love you properly.