I just called to say I love you!
What beautiful lyrics and indeed, it calls to mind the feelings everyone has when they have a dear friend living across the country.
It’s all the more emotional when that special someone is your boyfriend, someone who’s already exclusively dating you. Calling someone and assuring them of your love is a great way to keep intimacy alive.
Sure, it always seems like your long-distance boyfriend is into you, still in love, and still patiently waiting. But how do you know for sure? Do you ever wonder if he’s just being nice or maybe getting bored of the relationship?
Sure, it’s natural to wonder. But it’s not a great idea to fixate on it or else jealousy might start to show. Instead, start paying attention to the signs. For example, there are at least nine signs you might notice that suggest your LDR boyfriend is still very much in love and probably growing in love just a little more, as every day passes. Let’s consider one at a time and determine once and for all if his affection is real.
1. He’s made it clear he’s not seeing anyone else.
Guys tend to brag a little when it comes to their fidelity. Some do it with less than honorable intentions – as in guilting you into a relationship you don’t want. But most guys actually do it just to show you that they take this relationship seriously. He might want you to know that he’s not playing you and that everything is coming from the heart. He’s not just resisting other women. He’s not interested in any other women. That’s a great sign.
2. He always tells you how much he misses you and longs to be near you.
This is a great sign! A man who’s losing interest doesn’t grow in his desire for you. When he’s effusive and poetic (not just about sex but about living with you and being part of your life) that’s a clear sign that what you’re doing is working. Keep it up!
3. He will always make time to communicate with you, even in little ways.
You won’t always have time for each other every minute of every day. But if he’s in love he will always make an effort to touch base with you, even if it’s just a text message. He needs you in his daily life. You inspire him and he draws strength from thinking about you. There is no such thing as just a text. You’re the light of his life, so any and all messages are dear to him.
4. He never breaks any promises.
Guys can’t always deliver the world to their girlfriends. But the smart, mature and sane guys out there don’t promise things they don’t intend to deliver. If he values you and wants to protect your heart he will protect you from making false promises, even if they’re made in texting or in the heat of the moment. He will be honest about what he can do (or can’t do) and what he wants. He will only promise what he personally makes come true. Living up to your standards means everything to him.
5. He doesn’t try to control you, but encourages your independence.
A lot of men are so insecure they will turn into controlling monsters because of the stress of a long-distance relationship. That’s precisely why you want to meet a strong and independent man – someone who is not threatened by your life or your goals. He trusts you. He wants you to be happy and achieve your goals. He is your biggest fan, so to speak.
6. He has his own goals, as an independent person.
Not only does he encourage your independence – he actually has his own life! He supports you in your endeavors because he has his own life goals and self-improvement projects. There’s no no jealousy or rivalry. You are truly two independent people that come together because you’re evenly matched. There’s no time for rivalry when you’re on the same team. Independence is a must when you’re separated by distance and time.
7. He always treats you with great respect.
It’s pretty easy for a man to tease you, get a laugh out of you and provoke you into a sexy and funny kind of argument. But beyond that, does he truly respect you? Do you always sense that he admires you, respects your life, and appreciates your character?
He accepts your decisions. He values your opinion and expertise. You always sense that he respects you because he makes you feel good about yourself. Whether he’s responding to a text, or talking on webcam, he remains the biggest source of positivity in your life.
8. He doesn’t keep secrets from you.
He doesn’t hide anything because he understands communication is what powers this long-distance relationship. He doesn’t just confess – he shares. Part of the intimacy you have together is your ability to speak and think freely. The minute the two of you start to keep secrets and selectively share thoughts and feelings, is the beginning of the end.
9. He always makes sure you’re happy and that your needs are met.
Finally, you know you’re in good virtual hands if he still goes out of his way to make you happy and make sure you’re getting everything you want and need out of this long-distance relationship. He is a pleaser and a healer – a man who works hard to keep you happy!
If a man doesn’t love you, it’s easy to profile his cyber behavior. He’s mostly interested in flirting and sex and then shuts down when it’s time for bonding or daily relationship stuff. But to a man who really loves you and is willing to wait for you, that’s the stuff he loves the most.
In closing, the best way to know if he loves you is in a LDR by listening to what he says. He might say outright, or he might say it in more subtle ways. Like, giving gifts. Or making you laugh. Or wanting to be involved in your life a little bit more. Learn his love language, so to speak, and then you’ll feel it every time he says that he loves you in his own unique way.
When a Man Truly Loves You
Lasting love from a man comes down to a few things most women are never taught.
Get them right and he holds on. Miss them and even a good man drifts.
I made a short video that explains what makes a man fall deeply in love and stay.
