7 Signs He’s Taking You for Granted

If he still respects you wants the relationship to work he will meet you halfway. If he’s too far gone, he will lose respect for you. That’s when you have to walk away.

I think it’s safe to say that you can always FEEL when a man is taking you for granted. Women are highly intuitive and they can sense when a man is withholding, resentful or preoccupied. When a man starts taking you for granted, however, it’s not always the sign of a doomed relationship.

Sometimes a man may become complacent and just tired of working so hard to please. Or, he may be resentful about one specific problem, but is perhaps unwilling to tell you. Another scenario is that he may just be getting a little conceited thinking he is doing you favors, without actually realizing how important you are to his life.

Whatever the case, there’s an easy way to determine if your guy is taking so you for granted: he STOPS chasing you. We often discuss the necessity for men to chase women, even in committed relationships. When he’s chasing you he’s happy, when he’s not chasing, or worse yet when you’re trying to please him, the dynamic is off. There’s an unhappy air to the whole relationship.

Let’s discuss seven signs that show if a man is taking you for granted and what kind of solution might work for these problems—if any.

1. He doesn’t rush to answer your texts or phone calls anymore.

In the beginning he used to respond quickly. Lately, it’s whenever he gets around to it. He’s not apologetic either. Maybe the best way to get a better reaction would be to start changing the topics of conversation. Stop sending errands through text. Go back to making texts fun, unpredictable and appealing to him. Let him associate texts as

something positive rather than neutral.

2. He ignores his physical appearance.

Not only does he avoid showering, but he never really fixes himself up for you anymore. I’ve actually noticed this trend a lot in couples, not just men. Married couples sometimes go days without ever trying to look attractive, or even months without dressing up just for each other. At this point, both partners really need to make a conscious effort to get out of the routine and start having fun again.

3. He avoids spending time with you in favor of his usual (passive) routine.

Why of course, hanging out with his friends, watching the big game, surfing the internet or watching movies…this is what he prefers to do instead of talking. The problem here is there’s been a downward spiral of intimate conversation over time. He no longer feels challenged or excited about talking. Perhaps it’s time to start finding common interests again and building on those. Don’t make talking a family chore…find out what he wants to discuss and let him feel free to vent.

4. He’s lost the fear of losing you.

When a guy first meets you, he chases you, he tries so hard to please you. Even if he’s trying to be seductive and flirty, you can tell he wants your reaction. He wants your attention and he craves your laughter and your smile. Now contrast that to a man who’s just resigned from all interaction. He’s irritable, busy, thoughtless and almost resentful about being in your presence. He sees you as an opponent. He doesn’t fear losing you and makes it clear that pleasing you is not a priority.

Catching this behavior early on is important because the longer this “resentment” stage goes on, the more easily it develops into disrespect and maybe even contempt for the marriage / relationship itself. As early on as you notice something is off, ask him what’s bothering him. Are there communication problems? Are you chipping away at his independence or becoming too reliant on him? Finding out the root cause of his anger will help you determine the next course of action.

5. Your sex life is nonexistent…and so is your emotional intimacy.

Of course sex a nothing…but you know things are bad in the relationship when you hardly cuddle anymore, rarely talk and never really “connect” like you used to do. What often happens is that the favors a man does for a woman (or vice versa) can erode over time into expectations. Expectations are easy to take for granted. Because no one likes chores, no one likes the feeling of obligation. This is a crucial time to change your lifestyle and your approach to communicating. Re-imagine your sex life. Change the way you speak to each other and start re-learning who your partner is.

6. Everyone tells you that you deserve better.

Now things are getting ugly. If you feel that you can’t tell if your relationship is healthy anymore, the best thing to do is to go outside those walls and ask a friend or family member the truth. They will rarely lie, I tell you this. Parents, siblings and close friends are careful to notice the signs of unhappiness in a relationship. They have nothing to lose and that’s why they tell the truth. When they say you “deserve better” that’s a sure sign that he takes you for granted. That means they see how hard you try to make things work and how little he tries. At this point, it may be too late to save the relationship. What matters is getting away from this dysfunctional energy so you can regroup and figure out what you want.

7. He expects more from you constantly, but rarely ever listens.

This may be the final step in a dysfunctional relationship that becomes abusive. When you are constantly trying harder, usually at his request, but he gives you almost nothing in return. Now he’s taking advantage of your gullibility and innocence. He may blame you for all his problems or even punish you for all your unknown sins.

While not every relationship is doomed, once a man loses all respect for you—whether because of you or simply because he’s NEVER happy in any relationship—it’s very hard to salvage it.

One absolute in all these cases is that you must PULL BACK and stop giving so much in the relationship. Determine that you’re no longer going to work so hard and try to please him. Pull back and give him independence while you reclaim your own. You both must grow as individuals before pursuing the relationship.

A man taking you for granted is always a hurtful experience. But if you sense that he still has love for you, and that he still has RESPECT for you, it may not be too late. Talk to him and approach things from a positive frame of mind. If there’s still love in his heart he will meet you halfway and you can start to rebuild.

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Talk soon,

Matthew Coast

P.S. If you’ve been banging your head against the wall because you’ve fallen for a man who’s frustratingly unavailable…

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About The Author

Matthew Coast

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1 Comment

  • Favour Amara

    Reply Reply June 19, 2018

    Love you write up Sir… Tnks it’s really helping me in my new relationship…. Good bless you

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