Married men have an allure to them that single men oftentimes don’t. It’s not just the “taboo” of the attraction either, even though that can be hard to resist.
Rather, it’s the idea that married men have more to offer you and have a proven record of success when it comes to relationships. Single men are unproven and a bit of a wild card. For instance:
Married men:
• Usually have a steady job and reliable income
• Have more experience with relationships and family
• Tend to be wiser and more interesting
• Have experience in managing a home life
• Are very passionate, especially if they have a dead bed marriage
Married men have an allure to them that single men oftentimes don’t. It’s not just the “taboo” of the attraction either, even though that can be hard to resist.
Rather, it’s the idea that married men have more to offer you and have a proven record of success when it comes to relationships. Single men are unproven and a bit of a wild card. For instance:
Married men:
• Usually have a steady job and reliable income
• Have more experience with relationships and family
• Tend to be wiser and more interesting
• Have experience in managing a home life
• Are very passionate, especially if they have a dead bed marriage
Married men are “eager to please” in a new extramarital relationship and come across as great listeners, lost souls, and almost virginal in their enthusiasm to connect with someone else.
That, together with the whole “want what you can’t have” thing certainly makes a married man attractive in many ways.
The allure of married men is actually a scientific phenomenon. According to one survey, women ranked pictures of “married men” higher than those of single men – even though the pictures were identical. All that changed was the relationship status reported by the survey researchers. Ninety percent of respondents rated a married man’s picture high on the attractiveness scale, but the percentage dropped to 59 percent when respondents were told he was single.
Some theorize that women right be instinctively attracted to success, and so a married man has that sort of “social proof” that he’s a good husband. (Double pity points if his wife seems like a terrible person!)
Others theorize that women are actually attracted to the beauty of the married man’s wife. The more attractive and successful the wife is, the more the mistress envies her.
Whatever the case, one thing’s for sure. Dating married men RARELY ends happily. For every one amazing success story of mistress-turned-wife, there are about ten disaster stories that ends with a lonely and heartbroken mistress.
And you know, it’s kind of condescending to say, that dating married men is a bad idea. We’ve all heard that before. We’ve all heard the guilt attached with the situation.
But we usually don’t hear a lot about the WHY – why it never works out. That’s what we’re going to talk about in this discussion.
Why is dating a married guy a bad idea? Because there are at least 6 reasons why he’s NEVER going to leave his wife for you. After we consider these ten points, try to consider things from his perspective.
1. If a married guy only wants sex from a mistress, then he has no reason to leave his wife.
Don’t confuse a man’s desire to connect with a new lover as the desire to bond emotionally with another spouse. Most men can’t even handle two emotionally complex romantic relationships at the same time. This is why the man uses the mistress for sex – not much thinking required.
2. Admitting adultery and divorce is way too much drama for most guys. He’d rather keep it a secret.
Guys may dream about getting remarried and starting over. But considering how expensive and stressful divorce can be, not to mention the drama of confessing the truth to his wife, it’s no surprise that many men will chicken out and dump the mistress.
3. Men who decide to leave their wives, actually DO leave and they do it pretty quickly once they make up their mind. Men who talk about leaving…er, usually don’t leave.
Men who talk are usually just venting about their problems. Some will cheat, and some never do cheat. But all they really want is a listening ear, or maybe a free therapist. These types of guys never follow through on their mistress’s plans. Once a man wants to leave, he leaves. But a guy who only talks about leaving and never makes any real plans, clearly doesn’t WANT to leave in the first place.
4. He still loves her. He hasn’t decided if he loves you or not.
Married men may like you a lot. He may even say he loves you. But the truth is, love takes time. This is an evaluation period, where he’s trying to figure out if he loves you as much as his wife. Usually, the answer is no. He’s been through more with his wife, more history, more memories. He knows he loves her. He doesn’t really know you yet. And if he’s still in love with her (and still living with her) then he’s comparing you to her. The wife is at an advantage to win because she knows him so well. Mistresses almost always lose.
5. He has children with her and feels obligated to take care of them.
Even if he doesn’t love her anymore, it’s very difficult to break up a happy family – even if that happiness is simulated for the good of the children.
6. Even if he’s not in love with her, he’s still bonded with her – not you.
He has a long history of romance, love, connection, and emotional ties with her that probably go very, very deep.
He has excitement with you that is probably somewhat new.
The first is far more likely to keep him there than the second is to pull him away permanently.
7. He was only interested in a vacation relationship – not actually getting married again.
Conclusion
In closing, the most important thing to remember about dating married men is that the relationship is only as successful as the way you FEEL, most of the time.
The sad fact is, waiting for a man to love you completely, is a mostly miserable experience. For every good night you have, there will be countless lonely nights. Many days of dreaming. Many moments of disappointment and heartbreak.
The simple fact is that dating a married man means to love someone that is already in love with someone else. You’re not only waiting, you’re dividing your love for this man with another woman who claimed him first. Even if he’s trying to break up with her, that process may take years.
Some men never leave. They simply experiment for a while. At some point, the man you love and patiently wait for may realize he took his wife for granted. He puts forth his full effort to win her over again while kicking you to the curb.
This is statistically what happens. So while I can’t say it’s impossible to live happily with a married man, I do think it’s important to remind you of what could happen – and what statistically usually does happen.
He wins, you lose. You deserve better than that. You deserve a man who is free to date and knows what he wants – a strong and successful woman like you!
The 5 Word Phrase That Destroys a Man’s Love For You And Drives Him Out Of Your Life
There’s a simple 5 word phrase that will destroy any man’s love for you and drive him out of your life completely…
It usually comes out as an honest question when you want to connect with him…
But only serves to push him away and slowly kill your relationship from the inside out…
It can take a man who is filled with love and passion for you…
And make him feel cold, distant, and uninterested…
Have you figured out what it is yet?
Many women send this as a text message when they’re feeling insecure…
And then are confused why he suddenly pulls away and disappears completely…
Most of the women who ask it don’t even know how harmful it is…
Yet it can take a relationship that seems like it’s perfect…
A relationship where you feel loved, cared for, and like you’ve finally found “the one”…
And overnight, it can tear that relationship apart…
Leaving you confused, frustrated, and heartbroken…
If you don’t know what this simple yet seemingly innocent question is…
I want you to stop what you’re doing and go watch this video presentation that I put together for you at the link below…
Click here to watch the video now <<
My name is Matthew Coast and I’ve been teaching in the dating industry on since 2005…
I’ve helped hundreds of thousands of women, all over the world…
Get into relationships where they feel loved, seen, and cherished by the men they’re with…
When you click the link this link right here <<
I show you what this 5-word phrase is…
I’ll teach you about why men pull away, how to stop it from happening…
And how to attract the man you want…
Into a relationship where you’re loved and adored and treated like a priority…
No matter how painful things have been in your past…
You can attract a great man and have a great relationship…
Just click the link on your screen and watch the video right now…
If you’re struggling with men pulling away from you…
If you’re tired of giving everything to a relationship and only being taken for granted…
And if you’re ready to have a man see you as a woman that he wants to be with forever…
I don’t know if he loves me for sure but he always say he wants to have a baby with me