One of the best ways to attract men (and ANY man for that matter, even if he’s not interested) is to project the qualities of what I like to tall a “high value woman.” It seems that a lot of women today put too much emphasis on designer clothing, perfect bodies and of course, the famous “viral video” that gets 15,000 likes. But is that real “value”?
In terms of dating, I’d say not. Most men don’t care about what brand name you’re wearing or that you’re a size 0, or that you were retweeted by Khloe Kardashian – you know, the “smart one.” What they care about are definite signs of high value.
Once they sense you are a high value woman that attracts their attention almost at an involuntary gut-level. That means you’re not an “average” woman. You’re not one of the many. You’re something exceptional, well out of the ordinary. And that’s when he realizes what a great couple you would make, if only he could qualify for that honor.
That’s why we’re going to talk about signs of a high value woman. Because if you can learn these high value signs and start to consciously show them to men when you’re around them, you will NEVER have to worry about attracting men ever again. It’s just programmed into our human nature that high-value qualities attract people.
“Yeah but what if …”
That’s just the thing. It’s not always easy to show signs of high value and in some cases it may require a major lifestyle change to get you to that successful point. But it can be done and it can be done by you.
For now, let’s focus on the signs that the man wants to see. These are the qualities he notices immediately upon seeing you and meeting you.
1. You take care of yourself physically and that makes you self-confident.
I know that some people hyper-focus on the “ideal” body shape, but I really don’t think that’s the primary attraction. Men’s tastes in beauty also tend to fluctuate. Super skinny girls use to be the gold standard years ago, but now the hourglass figure is popular.
Fashion also changes radically every 5-10 years so general awareness of social norms in fashion, makeup and hairstyling is also required. The simple science of the matter says it’s not so much about how you look, but that you put your health first and project an attitude of fitness and self-confidence.
Men are attracted to women who take care of themselves physically. Yes, this means working out and dieting. Many men are drawn to women who look at least moderately physically fit because it’s in our nature to seek out healthy partners. Morbid obesity implies poor health. By our evolution and genetics, humans avoid whatever looks unhealthy.
But in case you’re wondering, why do some movie stars and politicians and other powerful, rich men marry women who are not always A+ beautiful? Because most men are not looking for perfection. They’re just looking for healthy. And any woman can get healthy if she makes it a life goal. You will feel better and your natural self-confidence will grow.
He may even count on you for health tips and lifestyle changes if he’s never thought about it before.
Most importantly, you will begin to project the quality of sexy, available and attractive. And that is exactly the first impression you will make upon meeting him.
2. You care about other people, even people you’ve never met before…even people halfway across the world.
The one quality that so many wealthy and successful men have in their marrying patterns is that of empathy. Empathy (the ability to understand what another person is feeling) is what moves women to become activists. Empathy gives all of us the quality of compassion. It makes us talk about more important things. It also helps to keep us humble and appreciating how beautiful life is.
Once you begin to project qualities of kindness, a man will take note. Your crush will start to see you as someone unique—someone strong and yet compassionate, like their mother and other strong female figures in their life. They may even view you as having good maternal instincts in case they ever want to start a family.
A woman with empathy cares about family, his family and your own.
So contrary to whatever you’ve heard out there, don’t try to be cold-hearted, extremely “hard to get” or wear an air of entitlement. This is not what mature and available men are looking for. In fact, your compassion for other people and your need to be empathetic towards other people will actually keep you busy in life and NOT exclusively devoted to him or subservient to his every whim. Having a life purpose apart from being happily married keeps you busy.
3. You are interested in HIM.
Most women make the mistake of talking about themselves, which allows the man to fawn over you and flirt…but doesn’t actually do much for building an emotional connection. A high value woman who wants to be liked by men will engage him in conversation. She will ask questions, be interested in what he does (not just his career, but his hobbies and personal life goals) and will make conversation.
Doing this accomplishes two goals: (1) it makes him feel a growing emotional attraction (“Whoah she really likes me!) and (2) it makes you come across as mysterious, since he still doesn’t know much about you. Good, that means he’ll have to work at it to get more information out of you. And this getting-to-know you process is what gradually builds emotional connection.
4. You are emotionally, mentally and conversationally mature.
Sad but true, but men do judge a relationship by the conversation. Men are attracted to women who are emotionally mature (meaning stable and not a wild child), mentally mature (not into hot/cold mind games) and who can carry an interesting conversation. This may require that you learn more about interesting subjects like science, history, politics, religion, pop culture, sports and so on. Keep in mind, this also means you have to study the man you’re interested and figure out what subjects he loves to talk about. This will always give you an edge over immature girls who prefer shallow conversations.
In short, men are attracted to feminine women: smart women, mature women and women beaming with self confidence.
If you’re fretting right now, thinking “I can’t be like that…that’s not me.”
I beg to differ. This is you and this can be you. It’s just the “you” of the future, the you in an evolved state of mind. And I’m going to help you become the empowered, successful woman you’ve always wanted to be. Look for our next article on the subject How to Be a High Value Woman and I’ll show you how easy and rewarding it can be.
This makes him see you as the One Special Woman in his life…
If you’re struggling with a man who plays “hot and cold,” is slipping away, or taking you for granted…
And you want him to see you as “the one special woman” in his life…
Then you’re probably missing this one strange secret…
Click here to discover the secret <<
This one thing makes a man feel an irresistible desire to pursue you…
…invest in you…
…fight for you…
…and move mountains to please you and be with you.
If you’re ready to finally be seen and cherished by the man you choose, you may just need to just do or say one thing differently.
Click here to be cherished by the man you want <<
Talk soon,
Matthew Coast
P.S. Even if a man is pulling away, ignoring you, or taking you for granted…
You can completely change the way he sees you and make him yours with this one little secret…
Click here to discover the secret that will make his heart yours <<
Wonderful.Its so helpful and I will put it to work.thanks Mathew Coast
I AM SO GRATEFUL TO GOD FOR YOU BEING A MAN WHO ALLOWS WOMEN TO KNOW HOW MEN AND WHAT SATIFY THEIR MALE EGO. YOU ARE GODSENT, WITH LOVE AND RESPECT ❤
This is wonderful advice Matt, I have always wondered why I attract guys that are only interested in sex or just a one night stand….I guess it reflects more about my lifestyle and the places I used to hang out and I overlooked the red flags.. I didn’t ever think about me being a high value woman because I didn’t essentially value myself.. so thank you for helping me out. This was extremely helpful.
I really do understand because I love this man because he tell me advice what he would do.
Exactly
So true
Really am falling in love with this exceptional man and want this to work…
“This is you and this can be you. It’s just the “you” of the future, the you in an evolved state of mind.”
That hit home for me.
I appreciate all articles/ emails / videos from Matthew Coast. I’ve been able to slowly shape my relationship into a healthy one.
Maybe in Europe but here in Africa Men mind about makeup and designer clothes than other qualities
Then they only care about the superficial stuff, that doesn’t keep a long
lasting healthy relationship, no man can truly be in love with a female being superficial like that.
That’s because in Africa men spend money qnd how your woman looks reflect on you. Qnd let’s not talk about superficial things because guess what marriages that are traditional in Aftica lasts longer. Cheers
In my last relationship I was very interested in this man and we always talked about his day, his work as I asked many questions. I started to notice there weren’t a lot of reciprocal questions about me or my day, my hopes, my dreams etc. I intentionally withheld information or I should say I didn’t offer any information and it became so one-sided I realized this was either a relationship of friends or I was just someone to talk to. There were other factors why I ended the relationship but this was a primary reason. I felt he was way too self-absorbed and obviously not the right person for me. In my new relationship, that has been almost 2 years, I don’t want the same thing to happen. I want to make sure I’m not creating and fostering this one sided behavior. Any suggestions?
I understand about the one-sidedness you may be able to do something about it if when you see that behavior in him like if he comes in and tells the dog oh I love you and you’re so beautiful before you even looks at you while he’s telling the dog how beautiful she is say something light-hearted and a joking Manner and go oh thank you I appreciate that you look pretty nice yourself it kind of gets the point across without being too harsh or judgmental or punishing it’s always better to get your point across with a little chuckle
Iam me and that’s the way I was taught my parents says you should treat others the way you are treated..it call Respect.i love the 4 signs Thanks Nora
This is so true. But is only half the story. I’ve lost nearly 50lbs for health reasons, go swimming and yoga. I feel so great about myself as a result that I am projecting confidence like never before! I met a man who said I have all the qualities he’s looking for, as listed above by Matthew. It’s been 6 months but despite him saying, “do you know how many people I had to meet to find you” and apparently being his perfect woman, the relationship is not progressing. Every time it starts to, he puts the brakes on and pulls away again. We don’t break up, but he’s cooler – until he’s not! This appears to be a cycle. I’m trying to figure out how to break it and move it on. I don’t yet know if he is THE guy for me, but I can’t find out without some progression.
Hi Alisha,
you posted a while ago, but maybe this helps: Check out material on different attachment styles. Sounds like your guy may have an avoidant attachment style. Or maybe he is just a breadcrumbing a***, but let’s give him the benefit if a doubt. 😉
Best,
Claire
You be the one who pulls back..have him pursue you and you lean back. Soon you will know whether it is you he wants. It sounds like he is still searching. Consider yourself too valuable to be used that way.
You’re interested in him.?? That can also be a real big sign of codependency. Wanting to be someone’s mom is not a good thing. Being interested in him is not the same as telling him what to do. Fine line
I’m very greatful that I have all the information from you. A value woman is a great deal with all woman and to value themselves it’s sad that it’s hard to believe that generation s right now is going in different directions.
Thank you