There is no greater teacher than first-hand experience! It’s one thing to dream about a romance relationship that survives the test of time and distance. But it’s quite another thing to actually live through it…and even better, to survive the tests and trials and to end up happily married.
It’s not impossible. We all probably know at least one couple that met online or that kept chatting online or by phone even when they were living in different states for a year or two. There are plenty of success stories out there.
Then again, there are also plenty of horror stories about love gone wrong. How long-distance relationships started intense, romantic and affectionate…but then deteriorated into an epic love-hate story.
It’s time to be real. Long-distance relationships are challenging but they’re not as difficult to maintain as you’ve heard. At the same time, it’s not as easy as it seems at first glance. Just because you fall in love with someone doesn’t mean you’ve got an automatic Happily Ever After card!
In this discussion, we’re going to keep it real and list all the things that you learn when committing to a long-distance relationship. These are not the common sense things that everyone mentions before going into it.
These are observations, complaints, and wisdom shared by people who have actually made a long-distance relationship work. Here’s what you learn in that all important first year.
1. Emotions will be intensified.
Most long-distance relationship couples agree, waiting for each other can be a roller coaster ride of emotion. Despite all aims to keep calm and not let tensions escalate, oftentimes we do get emotional. We do get strong pangs of emotion, positive and negative. It can be frustrating, especially if your partner isn’t always there to console you. That’s why your love for each other has to be greater than the occasional spat.
2. You will have to make sacrifices.
No one gets through a LDR without feeling some pain and making some sacrifices. These might be small sacrifices. Or you never know, one of you or both of you may have to give something up to make this union work. Everything good in life comes at a personal price if not a material one. Sometimes we have tough decisions to make. But if we truly want something, we don’t mind the sacrifices.
3. You must be (or become) an independent person.
Either you’ve always been fiercely independent and self-motivated or you must learn that lifestyle. Because long-term relationships require patience. They also require both partners to be self-motivated and with their own independent goals in life. Usually, when one or both partners are too needy and have no will of their own, it’s only a matter of time before the relationship self-destructs.
4. You will be easily triggered.
No one is made of stone. When you lack a physical presence, you do take things more personally. Even if you’re not a jealous person, waiting for him, and not knowing what’s happening in his life, will be challenging. Accept that there may be arguments and there may be misunderstandings. But be resolute that you will work through them and not let your emotions, yours and his, get the best of you.
5. When you do get together, things won’t be like you imagine them.
We tend to build a fantasy of what life wil be like when we’re finally reunited with our true love. And while it’s wonderful to hold onto, it’s not fair to compare the fantasy with the physical reality. Your partner will fall short of perfection. Things will not be exactly as you imagined them. But that’s why you learn to love a person’s soul, their personality, their heart – not just their potential.
6. Your friends are not going to be your “rock.”
Friends are wonderful, of course, but it’s kind of ridiculous to think they’re always going to be there for you – with apologies to Monica and Chandler. Friends will give you the time, as they have it. But they’re not going to be there to hold your hand and fix your relationship problems. They will give moral support, whenever they can afford it. This is why we stress, independence and inner strength is what keeps a LDR together. You and yours, that’s who keeps love alive.
7. Your partner won’t always be there for you – but that’s okay.
It’s also unfair to assume that your partner is always going to be there for you, in those crucial moments when you’re freaking out and need his voice to calm you down. Sure, he might be there most of the time. But can he afford to take off work? What if he’s stuck in traffic one day? What if his internet goes out for a few days?
Something is always going to come up. But can you survive regardless? Can you be strong, for yourself, and for him, and wait until he’s free to talk? This will be a test. Don’t run into the arms of another man, just because your LDR boyfriend is not always there for you. What matters is whether he’s loyal to you, and the degree of love that he has for you. The stronger you are as a person, the stronger the relationship will be.
8. When you finally get together again…it’s like you never said goodbye.
This list isn’t all darkness and testing! The good news is that once you do get together again, it really does feel great! It feels as if you never said goodbye. And it feels as if you picked up right where you left off. Your chemistry is the same. The loneliness is gone. Waiting and suffering for each other no longer matters. You’re home in his arms!
9. As time goes on, you know in your heart this is what you truly want.
Even better, the longer you wait (whether months or even years) and the more you bond as a lifetime couple, the greater your love grows. It does NOT feel as if you’re barely hanging on by a thread. You actually grow in your love, and your faith in each other. He becomes more than a boyfriend. He is a source of peace in your life. Your hearts belong together and you both realize that. No matter what happens, you’ll survive the test, because this is what you both want!
Keep these points in mind as you anticipate your happy future.
The 5 Word Phrase That Destroys a Man’s Love For You And Drives Him Out Of Your Life
There’s a simple 5 word phrase that will destroy any man’s love for you and drive him out of your life completely…
It usually comes out as an honest question when you want to connect with him…
But only serves to push him away and slowly kill your relationship from the inside out…
It can take a man who is filled with love and passion for you…
And make him feel cold, distant, and uninterested…
Have you figured out what it is yet?
Many women send this as a text message when they’re feeling insecure…
And then are confused why he suddenly pulls away and disappears completely…
Most of the women who ask it don’t even know how harmful it is…
Yet it can take a relationship that seems like it’s perfect…
A relationship where you feel loved, cared for, and like you’ve finally found “the one”…
And overnight, it can tear that relationship apart…
Leaving you confused, frustrated, and heartbroken…
If you don’t know what this simple yet seemingly innocent question is…
I want you to stop what you’re doing and go watch this video presentation that I put together for you at the link below…
Click here to watch the video now <<
My name is Matthew Coast and I’ve been teaching in the dating industry on since 2005…
I’ve helped hundreds of thousands of women, all over the world…
Get into relationships where they feel loved, seen, and cherished by the men they’re with…
When you click the link this link right here <<
I show you what this 5-word phrase is…
I’ll teach you about why men pull away, how to stop it from happening…
And how to attract the man you want…
Into a relationship where you’re loved and adored and treated like a priority…
No matter how painful things have been in your past…
You can attract a great man and have a great relationship…
Just click the link on your screen and watch the video right now…
If you’re struggling with men pulling away from you…
If you’re tired of giving everything to a relationship and only being taken for granted…
And if you’re ready to have a man see you as a woman that he wants to be with forever…
