The thought of a long-distance relationship can be exciting and romantic. It might even seem practical, especially if you’ve met someone that completely gets you and who’s an almost perfect match.
Here’s the issue, however. It’s not that you need to meet the “right guy”. The real issue is, are YOU ready for a committed relationship? That’s not an easy question to answer. Even so, you have to go one step further and ask, “Am I ready for a long-distance relationship?” Not just the idea of one, but the physical and emotional reality of this unique experience?
It’s not a good idea to jump into an intense romantic relationship without anticipating the future. By thinking about these practical issues in advance you can avoid heartbreak and misunderstandings.
Let’s consider 7 signs that show you’re not ready for a long-distance relationship.
1. You NEED a physical relationship, above all else.
There’s no question that physical, sexual and sensual needs are important in a relationship. But if they are a high priority, and very important in your day-to-day life, it’s best to admit LDRs might be impossible for you right now.
If the two of you have high sexual desire and can’t physically be with each other, the temptation to cheat will be strong. The urge for romance might be overpowered by the need to physically be with someone when you need companionship. If your partner is not okay with it (and most aren’t) it will be a difficult struggle.
2. You’re lonely all the time.
Along the same lines, emotional needs must be met. But there’s only one cure to feeling lonely – go be with other people! Even family members or good friends can help you stop feeling alone.
The problem is, if this guy is the ONLY thing that makes you feel happy, and if he’s the only cure for your loneliness, you’re starting the relationship on very unstable ground.
Needing a man in your life is a dangerous reason to forge a relationship. Over time, you will start to feel clingy and the guy may balk at the pressure he feels to always take care of you.
Long-distance relationships only work if both partners can handle being alone, can go out and find platonic friends, and can be happy and independent when they’re not with their partner.
3. You already have communication problems in person.
If you always had misunderstandings in person, then trying to take this volatile relationship online is asking for trouble. Sometimes communicating tone and empathy through text is difficult, even without the stress of an LDR.
The best thing to do is to talk problems and misunderstandings out. But if you can’t be together in person and can’t quickly reach your partner to talk things out on the phone, tension will only escalate.
4. You don’t trust him completely.
What happens when resentment festers? Naturally, trust deteriorates. If you can’t trust your partner, whether because of infidelity, or even because of arguments over miscommunication, then this is never going to work. A lack of trust will destroy a good relationship. Being jealous of him will also chip away at a solid relationship.
Being able to trust him and give him his dignity will mean everything. If he’s an honest man, he will always tell the truth. He will always protect you and protect your heart. If love him, believe in him!
5. You’re not entirely sure what his goals/outlook is.
You love a man of mystery, right? Yeah, unfortunately in long-distance relationships question marks are usually a bad thing. If you just met him or if he doesn’t really share anything, then this LDR is always going to be strained. It’s best to find out who a man is and what his life goals for the future are – well before getting romantically involved with him.
Starting a relationship and then being separated by thousands of miles is usually a bad idea. You don’t know him. You’re idealizing him. He may be completely wrong for you and you may be missing out on better opportunities closer to home.
6. You hate texting, phone and web cam chat.
Yeah, no one loves cyber communication in place of real intimacy and conversation. But in a long-distance relationship, you have to learn to make it work. It’s not just formality either. You can’t just “check in” every day, as if you’re clocking in and out of work. You must take joy in each experience, making the most out of every conversation. Put passion and enthusiasm into every conversation you have, even if it’s by webcam or even a text message. The idea of someone is not enough to stay in love. You need to communicate with the man you love on a regular basis in whatever format is available.
7. You’ve never done well with commitment before.
Unfortunately, many people check out online dating and long-distance dating as the “solution” to their problems with commitment.
It never works out that way. If you’ve always had commitment issues, then you will still struggle with the problem, regardless of whether you meet the perfect guy in another country, or another state. Work on yourself first. Figure out what you want in a relationship and what you expect from a man, the standards you highly value. The life goals important to you, and how a partner can help you with those.
Simply put, a long-distance relationship isn’t about finding the “perfect partner” and filling that void of loneliness. It’s about finding someone compatible, someone you choose and someone you respect. It’s about enhancing your already great life with something positive that warms your heart. It’s worth waiting for. Why? Because you have taken years to work on yourself and become the successful woman you’ve always wanted to be. This long-distance relationship is something you both have made. Be proud of it!
It’s not always a critical thing to say you’re not ready for a long-distance relationship. LDRs are too difficult for many people to maintain. People oftentimes underestimate the challenges, thinking it’s all about the love and online flirting. The truth is, it’s much more complicated. Only you can determine if you’re ready to make that commitment and have a productive way to deal with the issues that do come up.
The best thing to do is familiarize yourself with the challenges that come from a long-distance relationship. Consider the most common problems. Talk to people that made it work and who couldn’t make it work. Learn from their mistakes and their success.
If you’re serious about wanting to make it work, you can. But it’s always better to anticipate what you’re up against. Avoid those mistakes and focus on building real trust.
The 5 Word Phrase That Destroys a Man’s Love For You And Drives Him Out Of Your Life
There’s a simple 5 word phrase that will destroy any man’s love for you and drive him out of your life completely…
It usually comes out as an honest question when you want to connect with him…
But only serves to push him away and slowly kill your relationship from the inside out…
It can take a man who is filled with love and passion for you…
And make him feel cold, distant, and uninterested…
Have you figured out what it is yet?
Many women send this as a text message when they’re feeling insecure…
And then are confused why he suddenly pulls away and disappears completely…
Most of the women who ask it don’t even know how harmful it is…
Yet it can take a relationship that seems like it’s perfect…
A relationship where you feel loved, cared for, and like you’ve finally found “the one”…
And overnight, it can tear that relationship apart…
Leaving you confused, frustrated, and heartbroken…
If you don’t know what this simple yet seemingly innocent question is…
I want you to stop what you’re doing and go watch this video presentation that I put together for you at the link below…
Click here to watch the video now <<
My name is Matthew Coast and I’ve been teaching in the dating industry on since 2005…
I’ve helped hundreds of thousands of women, all over the world…
Get into relationships where they feel loved, seen, and cherished by the men they’re with…
When you click the link this link right here <<
I show you what this 5-word phrase is…
I’ll teach you about why men pull away, how to stop it from happening…
And how to attract the man you want…
Into a relationship where you’re loved and adored and treated like a priority…
No matter how painful things have been in your past…
You can attract a great man and have a great relationship…
Just click the link on your screen and watch the video right now…
If you’re struggling with men pulling away from you…
If you’re tired of giving everything to a relationship and only being taken for granted…
And if you’re ready to have a man see you as a woman that he wants to be with forever…
