I Will Stop Giving You the Attention That You Are Constantly Refusing To Give To Me

Have you ever read a dating strategy book for women and just thought to yourself, “I don’t get it!”

Why are women so mean to men? Isn’t there such a thing as a nice guy? Maybe you even thought, “That’s fine for other women…but my man is different. We don’t play games. We just love each other.”

Well first of all, that’s great. If you found someone special who adores you and is forthright about who he is and how much he loves you, that’s great and no one should try to second-guess the relationship.

What I do want to tell people is that love is not a game, but rather a force of nature. I really do believe there are rules in dating, differences between men and women, that must be understood. If you understand these dynamics, but don’t ever need them, then more power to you.

If however, you ever find yourself feeling scared or sense the relationship is slowly breaking apart, I strongly advise you to start working with this force of nature rather than against it.

What is the dynamic I’m speaking of? To put it in just one simple sentence it’s this:

Your goal is to get the man to chase you. If he’s not chasing you, he’s not happy. If you start “chasing him” he gets really annoyed. Remember these main points when it comes to living and getting along with a man.

1. When men back away, you back away.

Now let’s say that in your good relationship, the conflict you have is usually very minor. Like when your boyfriend is cranky and doesn’t want to talk you…what’s the best thing to do?

If your instinct says to avoid him and just let him be, then you’re right. His anger, his bad mood is a force of nature. Getting in his face and demanding that he talk and express how he feels is only going to provoke him. What he wants the most is to be left alone.

2. When a man offends you by throwing your interest away, you don’t value his attention anymore.

Now in some instances, he may escalate the situation far beyond minor conflict. He might want to break up or might stop talking to you altogether. When this first happens, you’re left feeling a bit shell-shocked, aren’t you? You feel threatened by the idea of this hot relationship suddenly going so cold. You want to fix it, you want him to confide in you and tell him what’s wrong. This is a normal reaction…

And yet, once again, you’re going against the current. He wants his freedom. His wants independence, he wants a break from all this intimacy. And you’re giving him the opposite of what he wants, by clinging to him.

Now doesn’t the idea of a man “winning” this game upset you just a little bit? That he could throw a tantrum like this and get away with it? Well, that’s just it…you should NOT let him get away with it!

But the best “punishment”, if you will, is not to browbeat him and verbally batter him into submission. The best course of action is no reaction. To live happily without him. To send a strong message saying, “I am not going to give you any attention. Because you’re not giving me what I need.”

So you do NOT wait for him. You do not apologize. You move on. And he gets the message real fast, that if he wants your approval he better start trying again in this relationship.

3. You cannot “save” a relationship. It takes two people to keep a relationship alive.

Your instinct is to save what is precious, the relationship you built, that you invested so much time in. The problem is, that NO relationship can survive if only one partner is trying to keep it going. These relationships are doomed and it’s only a matter of time before the other partner, now fully taking advantage of the selfless, suffering partner, decides to walk away.

This is not so much about the dynamic between men and women as it is simply a painful life lesson. You can give and give and give until it hurts. But if someone else is not giving as much as you are, or is not even giving 5% compared to your 95%, then it’s time to accept that you’re trying far too hard to save something that your partner may not even want to save.

A woman with self-respect, with confidence, with a healthy and feminist view of herself, realizes that she cannot afford to single-handedly build a relationship if the man is not also fully invested in her. No matter what you feel inside, no matter what your heart says in desperation, if your boyfriend (or husband) doesn’t see value in the relationship, he will not fight for it. And it will all just be you, trying to resuscitate something that’s already dead.

4. You reward men you like with your best attention WHEN they give you the right kind of attention.

Try chatting with an Internet troll sometime and learn to appreciate the value of time. You can waste hours of your life talking to someone who doesn’t care about your perspective at all and only wants to get a rise out of you.

It will work too…if you let him win. He wants your attention and if you’re not careful you will fall into that trap.

The same thing is true in relationships that are imbalanced. Is the guy you’re aching over really giving you the attention you want—the right kind of attention? Or do your exchanges always seem to end with him pissing you off and saying whatever it takes you get you upset and creating more negative energy?

This is the wrong type of attention and you cannot reward that juvenile behavior if you really want the change the nature of the relationship. You must be strong and intentionally not react to him when he ignores you or gives you the wrong kind of attention.

This is not necessarily “training him” as much as it’s sending a strong message. Namely, that since he refuses to give you what you need in this relationship, you are no longer going to reward him with your honest heart and your full attention. He doesn’t deserve it.

This is not really a mind game at all—it’s the very definition of a positive and respectful relationship dynamic. When two people respect each other, they give each other attention. When someone is trolling, or just taking their partner for granted, that ends the conversation.

Because you won’t respond to men who don’t appreciate your time or your feelings. He’s either going to learn real fast what your boundaries are and shape up, or you’re going to walk away from him and find a man who appreciates you for who you are.

It’s time to take a stand against men who don’t value your time and attention. Be strong. Be a woman that men love and a role model that other women can look up to.

The Secret Words That Make His Heart Yours

Today I want to give you some words that you can tell your man that will make him want to give you the relationship you’ve always dreamed he’d have with you…

These words form something I call a “Love Frame” that make a man feel like it’s his mission in life to treat you like a queen.

If you’re struggling to get your man to “step up” and give you the romance you’ve always wanted, you need to watch this video right now…

Click here to watch the video <<

These words will work on him even if…

…your man is pulling away from you or ignoring you completely…

…you think you got intimate with him too soon…

…or you feel like your situation is hopeless…

Because once you understand it…

You’ll be able to trigger a flood of emotion throughout his body that melts away all resistance…

Making him see you as the perfect woman for him…

A woman that he wants to pursue, fight for, and be with from now until the end of time…

Click here to learn the words that make him yours <<

Talk soon,

Matthew Coast

P.S. Try out these seemingly innocent yet strangely powerful words on the man in your life and seem how quickly things change with him…

Making him feel more love for you, more of a connection to you, and more of a desire to please you than he’s ever felt for anyone before in his life.

Click here to discover the words now <<

About The Author

Matthew Coast

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