“Hey, he may be toxic but I still love him and he loves me!”
…Said nobody ever! Oh sure, at some point you may think you’re in love with a toxic person. However, by the time you see firsthand their patterns of lying, total lack of care for your feelings, and a persistent pattern of physical, verbal or mental abuse, you realize that this was a relationship doomed to fail.
The problem is it is really hard to spot a toxic person when you first meet them and sometimes even a year into the relationship. However, by the time months turn into years you start to realize that the relationship is one-sided. You put in so much effort to make things work, to get him to communicate with you…but you end up disappointed.
This is because, psychologically speaking, it’s nearly impossible to make things work with a sociopathic or narcissistic person. Without getting into the specifics of each disorder, let’s just call them “toxic” for the time being. They are poisonous lovers and although they may tell you they love you (and yes, although the sex may be terrific), you will never actually feel loved. Here are six signs to look for that strongly indicate your current crush is a future mistake.
1. Drama seems to follow them…and yet it’s never their fault!
The toxic man has a way of causing drama in his life without ever owning up to his own mistakes. He only sees his side of the story and so all of his exes are crazy, and he’s literally on bad terms with every ex he’s ever had. He can’t be friends with them nor show any civility because he’s treated them horribly and refuses to own up to it.
Now it’s true that everyone makes mistakes in relationships. But a mature man is capable of acknowledging his mistakes, and his ex’s mistakes, without painting every woman he ever dated as a complete psycho. If he’s been constantly mistreated by every single woman he’s ever met in his life, there’s something not right with him. Nobody is a perpetual victim in life. We all make mistakes but we own up to the ones we make.
2. Before him, you felt normal. Now you feel crazy and needy.
A real man wants to you to be your best. A toxic man needs you to feel dependent on him. He will go so far as to convince you that you’re going insane if you happen to be critical of him or are opposing his will. “Gaslighting” is a technique abusers use to convince their partners that they’re going mad…when in fact, everything you notice about the imbalance in this relationship is true. However, he’s dead set on persuading you to think it’s all in your head and he’s absolutely perfect.
Ask yourself if you remember feeling better before you met this man. Do you like the person you’ve become?
3. He hides verbal abuse behind his hilarious jokes.
A long time ago, Sigmund Freud realized that his buddy that always called him fat and hideous looking was actually a jerk—and not “just joking”. (Or so we assume) The point is, Freud pioneered the idea that there is some truth in every joke and from there, modern psychology has expanded upon the idea. While there may be no truth in doing a comedy bit about killer rabbits in medieval times (thanks Monty Python), if your man-crush is always putting you down and making your lack of whatever the butt of the joke, it’s not very funny.
In fact, it sounds like he’s just berating you and pretending that it doesn’t count because he was just joking. Real men can make jokes without constantly insulting their partner, it’s not actually that hard to do. If he’s harassing you so early on in the relationship, this mean-spirited sense of humor will only get worse over time.
4. He is not just a little jealous…he’s actually insanely controlling!
Maybe all men are a “little jealous” of other guys getting your attention. But if your man is downright paranoid about whom else you talk to and is always trying to put down your friends, family and acquaintances, it’s downright creepy. He is being overly-critical for a reason. He doesn’t like the fact that these other people have control over you because he wants full control. His self-esteem is so low that he feels the only way to keep you faithful to him is to eliminate the competition and preferably, by locking you behind closed doors, keeping you attentive to him and only him. If you feel suffocated by him.
5. A Special Case: The Overly Nice Guy
“He is way too nice. Like, ridiculously nice.”
Now granted, guys who are generally nice are not a bad thing. And frankly, even if the guy is way TOO NICE he’s not necessarily a toxic guy or a bad guy. The problem is when he’s way too nice, he just needs a woman (any woman) to make him happy. That’s dangerous ground. This guy is going to be hard to live with because he has jobs for you and he has fantasy ideals that are simply not based in reality. Chemistry isn’t important to him, just the fact that you’re a woman is enough.
He’s not happy on his own and defines his happiness by the relationship he’s in. Guys that are way too nice seem almost desperate to commit to a relationship. If you’ve ever felt a lack of chemistry with a nice guy, it was likely because you sensed he was desperate and that “just anybody would do”. But no woman wants to fall in love with a man who desperately needs any woman to bring meaning to his life. You want to fall in love with a guy who loves you for you, the unique person that you are.
Stay away from these toxic personalities and aim higher. You deserve a man who’s self-confident, kind, smart and successful. Exude confidence yourself and you will attract the type of man you really want.
The 5 Word Phrase That Destroys a Man’s Love For You And Drives Him Out Of Your Life
There’s a simple 5 word phrase that will destroy any man’s love for you and drive him out of your life completely…
It usually comes out as an honest question when you want to connect with him…
But only serves to push him away and slowly kill your relationship from the inside out…
It can take a man who is filled with love and passion for you…
And make him feel cold, distant, and uninterested…
Have you figured out what it is yet?
Many women send this as a text message when they’re feeling insecure…
And then are confused why he suddenly pulls away and disappears completely…
Most of the women who ask it don’t even know how harmful it is…
Yet it can take a relationship that seems like it’s perfect…
A relationship where you feel loved, cared for, and like you’ve finally found “the one”…
And overnight, it can tear that relationship apart…
Leaving you confused, frustrated, and heartbroken…
If you don’t know what this simple yet seemingly innocent question is…
I want you to stop what you’re doing and go watch this video presentation that I put together for you at the link below…
Click here to watch the video now <<
My name is Matthew Coast and I’ve been teaching in the dating industry on since 2005…
I’ve helped hundreds of thousands of women, all over the world…
Get into relationships where they feel loved, seen, and cherished by the men they’re with…
When you click the link this link right here <<
I show you what this 5 word phrase is…
I’ll teach you about why men pull away, how to stop it from happening…
And how to attract the man you want…
Into a relationship where you’re loved and adored and treated like a priority…
No matter how painful things have been in your past…
You can attract a great man and have a great relationship…
Just click the link on your screen and the watch the video right now…
If you’re struggling with men pulling away from you…
If you’re tired of giving everything to a relationship and only being taken for granted…
And if you’re ready to have a man see you as a woman that he wants to be with forever…
