How to Send a “I Love You” Text Messages

We talk a lot on this blog about prematurely declaring your love! Some women have even written me and asked, “Is it really a bad idea to tell a guy I love him? What if he thinks I’m playing hard to get? What if he wants to hear me say it first? Do I always have to wait until he says it first?”

Good question. I know your instincts may sometimes tel you, “Tell him how you feel! Tell him now before it’s too late!”

Makes me think of that song by The Exciters, “Tell him that you’re always gonna love him, Tell him, tell him, tell him, tell him right now!”

And I don’t want to be pious and tell you, “NEVER EVER tell him first!” because I do think in some circumstances, it might work.

But what I do want to warn you about is what happens in the majority of cases. There are atypical men out there, sure – but here’s what the average man is thinking. Okay? Ready?

The average man wants to WIN you over, he wants to chase you, and he wants you to fall in love with him AFTER he makes up his mind, AFTER he decides you’re the one he wants. If you interfere with that mental process, he will probably resist you.

He’ll start to wonder why you’re rushing him. Or he may simply think, “I like her…but something is missing.” Of course something’s missing! He still hasn’t decided if he likes you!

So the priority here is not playing a game of “You say it first.” The real goal is to let him chase you, let him move the relationship at his own pace, and to remind him how valuable and how amazing you are. This is what ATTRACTS him. Attraction is a stronger motivator than manipulation and even seduction.

Good, so let’s say the scenario is: he just said “I love you.”

Wonderful! So now what? Now you can say, “…Me too!”

Hmmm…not very dramatic, is it? Keep in mind that if a man actually says those magic words he does EXPECT something back. He’s putting his heart on the line.

Now your natural instinct may be to giggle and say, “I love you too!” and that’s beautiful. But here’s a new thought. Give him a short reply the first time he says it and a BIGGER, more heartfelt reply the next morning, via text message.

Now you’re really going to tug at his heartstrings and give him the big reaction he wants.

You’ve had time to think about it. You’ve had time to write a thoughtful reply. And yes, of course, you’ve had time to consider the possibility that the relationship is a mistake.

Right now, he’s wondering what you’re thinking. NOW is the perfect time to hit him with one of these “I love you” texts that’s going to warm his heart.

1. “I just wish you could see yourself through my eyes, or through the eyes of anyone else. You have all these doubts…but I can promise you we all think you’re so wonderful. So special to me, to everyone you know. Know that you are loved by many. But only I can say that I love you the most.”

What a nice way to reassure him that he is loved and not just by you. Good guys tend to be really hard on themselves and need to be reminded that they have wonderful qualities.

2. “You told me yesterday that you loved me. I wonder…did you really think for a second I didn’t feel the same way? You are on my mind every morning. I think of you all throughout the day. You are the last thing on my mind when I go to sleep. And in dreams, we are still together. I love you.”

Wonderful way to reassure him that you feel the same way and feel the same rush of emotion and intensity that he does. Once a man says those words, his emotions are running high. Reflect back to him the joy and obsessive love that he has already expressed to you.

3. “I love listening to you talk about ____ (his favorite subject). I love the way your mind works. Your intelligence, your mystery, your charm…your sex god like abilities! I’m just in awe of how amazing you are. I love you so much.”

A little worship never hurts and men love to be congratulated and respected for what they are actually good at – what they consider a real achievement! That’s the best way to show him that you truly see him for what he is and love him all the more so.

4. “Well I’m off to bed. I used to love dreaming, entering that other realm. But now that I’ve found you and can feel you in person, and hear your thoughts whenever I want, and experience all of you physically and mentally…I look forward to waking up. I want to be in the world where you’re here. Mmm…I want to wake up in your arms again. I love that feeling. And love you (Name).”

Great romantic paragraph here, discussing how you prefer the “real him” to the dream, or symbolically, the “ideal him.” You know who he is in reality and that’s the man you love. It’s also a great way to whet his appetite for a live-in relationship, being able to wake up every morning in his arms. Get him excited like this and don’t be surprised if he pushes you for a commitment.

5. “How can you even ask me that? I have always loved you.”

Simple but crushingly effective! A man is always a little paranoid about his girlfriend not feeling as head over heels in love as he does. So one of the most effective ways to send him back that love is to playfully take offense at the question and then remind him that you loved him even before he said those words. This lets him know once and for all that your heart belongs to him.

As you can see, saying “I love you” back is not about suppressing your emotions and playing it cold. It’s just a matter of having the right timing and remaining confident – just the way he loves you!

10 Magic Love Triggers That Make Men Fall Hard For You

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Talk soon,

Matthew Coast

P.S. If you’ve been banging your head against the wall because you’ve fallen for a man who’s frustratingly unavailable…

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Matthew Coast

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