Confused by felling for him

Relationship Questions and AdviceCategory: QuestionsConfused by felling for him
Treasur asked 6 months ago

this is long but will shorten it….
I’ve casually had sex with this guy on occasions since high school, over 20 years ago. He’s had his women and children, I’ve dated men and have children. But somehow we always reconnect every couple years. The attraction/connection is still there. We always kept it cool and have an understand on mot commiting to each other. Like it’s fine the way it is, no drama, no commitment, nothing!! So I thought, lol I finally realized after all this time I have feelings for him, it makes me feel weird at times. But i will never open up to him unless he opens up to me first. He always had this very tough exterior because he is a Celebrity. I noticed since we have reconnected this time about 3 years ago, he has a soft spot, but it’s confusing. I mean, once he found out I was in a serious relationship it’s like he reaches out so much more. Plus, i havent had sex with him because of ny relationship. He said even if we never have sex again we will always be cool with each other because he would never wanna loss our friendship. So, I realized when I don’t reachout or speak to him for say 2 weeks, he sends me a message. If I send him a message by text, social media or call…he responds right away or answers. Before, it would be weeks or even months before he would hit me back. He posted an event he is hosting at one of his lounges the other day. I wanted to see what his response would be about sending me tickets. He said wait til he post the contest. I smirked and said “are you really telling me I have to wait?! Well if that’s the case forget it…I thought I was special smh” he replyed back “you are”. Then he texted me late at night to see if im up when he knows I live with my guy. Or if I text him, no matter what time he answers, i dont care what he’s doing. Does this mean, he really cares for me or wants more with me but don’t know how to say it?