Have you ever looked a man that you didn’t know directly in the eyes before? No, not in a creepy way… just confidently looked at him with a little bit of a smirk on your face while you did it?
To a quality guy, confidence is sexy… I’m not talking about the fierce, masculine confidence that some guys have. I mean being secure and certain about who you are and what your life is about.
There’s no being ashamed or not feeling worthy. You just have certainty about what you want to feel and experience in your life. Imagine if you had that kind of belief in yourself and what you’re about when it came to meeting and dating men.
You know exactly what you’re looking for, exactly what you want, and exactly how to get it. You have no worries, only beautiful, sexy, radiant charm. Wouldn’t that feel amazing?
Would you like to know how to develop that within yourself?
I haven’t always been a dating coach. I’m also an author and expert on passion, confidence and certainty.
Here’s one of the things I discovered:
The more certain you are about who you are and what you want, the easier it is to not only make sure you get what you want but that you only enter relationships where you both get what you’re looking for.
You begin setting boundaries and making sure that if someone comes into your life, they respect those boundaries or they leave. You begin asking for what you want in your relationships because you know you deserve it.
So, how do you create this certainty within yourself?
Put Your Mask on First
Have you ever been on an airplane before? Whenever the flight attendants are going through the safety instructions, they always say, “In case of an emergency, put your oxygen mask on before helping others.”
Why do you think they say that? It’s because it’s a lot more difficult to help others if your body is deprived of oxygen. It’s really difficult work with someone else if you pass out because your body has no oxygen in it.
It’s the same with relationships. Most people come into dating and they not only don’t put on their mask before getting there, they’re just sitting around waiting for someone else to put their mask on for them.
By this, I mean that they expect someone else to take care of their needs. They come into dating and relationships from a space of neediness.
And if you come from neediness, you’ll do two things:
- You’ll ONLY attract needy men.
- You’ll feel insecure because you’ll be dependent on someone else to make you feel whole and complete.
If you feel insecure and dependent, it’s hard to come into a dating situation with confidence and certainty. You’ll likely drive away any quality men that you meet.
Instead, take care of your own needs first. That way, you don’t need a man. You want one where the two of you can create something greater and more beautiful than you could on your own.
Embrace Your Mistakes
Everyone screws up. When I first began public speaking, I screwed up so many times that I lost count.
I embraced those mistakes though. And through learning from them and taking a light hearted attitude, I kept going and eventually became really good at speaking in front of people.
If you want to be confident in your dating life, you have to embrace the fact that you’re going to make lots of mistakes. And that’s okay.
If you attempt to control your mistakes because you want to look “perfect,” you’ll either come across as overly intimidating or stiff and rigid… or both.
Mistakes are what make you human. And being willing to open up and laugh at yourself will make you even more attractive. Just embrace mistakes as they come up and you’ll become a lot more confident.
Stop Chasing and Start Attracting
If you want to really be confident in your dating life, you need to stop chasing men and start attracting them. Many times, women don’t even know they’re chasing guy.
The problem is, what they think is harmless and friendly, guys interpret as suffocating and needy. If instead, you focus on how valuable you are to yourself and your relationships, men will find you a lot more attractive.
However, this takes understanding what men want and triggering their desires in a way that makes them see you as one-of-a-kind catch. As a dating coach, it’s my job to not only know what men want but to understand what triggers attraction in them.
You see, men want women in committed relationships as much as women do. In order to get a guy to want you for that type of a relationship though, you must connect with him in a way that makes him feel like he’s found someone who can relate to him like nobody else can.
After coaching thousands of men and women in their dating and love lives, I’ve discovered there are only a few distinct barriers that stop a woman from attracting a quality man into a committed relationship.
If you’d like to know which one is stopping you, click here to take the quiz. It’s free and I’ll show you exactly what’s stopping you from meeting Mr. Right and what you need to do in order to overcome it.
Disclaimer: Results will vary, and you should not use this information as a substitute for help from a licensed professional. Good luck!