Having an Amazing Relationship

 

You’ve met the ideal man!  He’s not just “successful” – he’s actually a really great guy who doesn’t have a Jekyll and Hyde thing going on.  Imagine that!  An eligible bachelor who isn’t a narcissist, sociopath or a caveman who thinks he’s god’s gift to women.

Maybe things are working out so well…that you’re even starting to fear something’s about to go terribly wrong!

That’s understandable.  If you’ve made mistakes before, or have had bad relationships before, it’s inevitable that you’re going to compare the past to the present.  Maybe you even fear some kind of happiness curse!  Things are going so well they can only get worse, right?

Relax…the odds are in your favor.  Just remember to stay calm and follow these simple dating strategies on a day to day basis.  This will guarantee you continue to have an amazing relationship with a man who truly gets you.

  1. Don’t let him fix you, don’t try to fix him. There is beauty in simplicity.

The best relationships really are that simple.  You respect each other.  You have things in common.  But most of all, you just enjoy each other’s company.  You find peace and joy in agreement.  Conflict is minimal.

Too often, we start depending on our partner, wanting him to do this or that, and to help us process the mistakes of the past.  That’s not Mr. Right’s job.  And helping him cope with his grief is not your job.  The biggest lie of dating is that you can fall in love with someone’s potential.  That this person can be the “cure” for ails you.

But it’s not true.  You heal yourself.  You cleanse yourself of past emotions, regret and toxic thoughts.  You give this partner the clean slate he deserves.  The love between you is refreshingly free of internal and external conflict.

There is no real “longing there”, there’s no need for the relationship to be some kind of “surrogate” or temporary fix to a deeper problem.  Both partners simply enjoy spending time together.

  1. Don’t let ANYONE define your relationship except you and yours.

Too often in life, other people are allowed to alter the dynamic in a relationship that’s none of their business.  Whether it’s a jealous friend, an ex, a sibling or even a dear mother who just wants to help, all of these unsolicited opinions should be censored, quite frankly.

Any negative commentary on a relationship you’re enjoying, and one that makes you feel good, is sour grapes—and it’s a dangerous influence.  Even if others claim that they want what’s best for you, to constantly undermine your happiness and volunteer suggestions on how to improve your private relationship is very rude behavior.  It’s destructive and it’s only going to influence you the more you listen to it.  Let other know in a kind way that you’re not interested in hearing any negativity.  You cherish your relationship and appreciate the privacy you have.

  1. Always believe in him. True love means supporting your partner in his passions and dreams.

Real love is based on building each other up.  Too many times in marriage we see one partner dominating the other and tearing them down…sometimes all in the name of “just being honest” or “just trying to help”.  But then again, most relationships (probably over 50 percent of all relationships) end in divorce.

The ones that last are the ones where both partners equally respect each other and support each other.  No, being on your partner’s side and believing in them does NOT mean that you must agree on everything.  Your partner doesn’t want your silent obedience, as if he’s a boss and you’re an employee.  Instead, he wants to know that you have faith in him; that you love him enough to defend his weaknesses, overlook his imperfections, and respect him enough to fight by his side for the values you both share.

  1. Always treasure intimacy and communication.

How important is sex in a relationship?  Very important, mainly because it is just one example of intimacy, communication and personal bonding.  You cannot have a relationship if one or both partners is avoiding communication and avoiding intimacy.  Intimacy doesn’t have to be purely sexual.  Some lovers who have been affected by disease or old age, still find ways to be intimate.

Whether it’s a whisper, a long talk, a gentle touch, or a sharing of feelings and old memories, communication is the bloodline of a relationship.  You communicate not just in words but in feeling.  In the way you touch each other, in your eyes, in the way you sense what the other is thinking or feeling.  Sometimes just knowing when your partner needs a hug or a kiss means the world to him!

  1. Don’t forget to love yourself!

Many good relationships succeed in the long-term because both partners are well adjusted and love themselves.  They have high self confidence and don’t put any unnecessary “weight” on their partner—expecting them to offer validation and determine self-worth.

Two mature adults in a caring and equal relationship are just as happy to be alone as they are to be together.  They are content by themselves; on a slow day when she wants to read and he wants to go out and work in the garage there is peace of mind.  They trust each other.  Jealousy is minimal because there is no feeling of “ownership” or of one person leading while the other obeys.

You are empowered and retain all rights in the relationship because you love yourself and you don’t sacrifice beyond what you want to give.  Don’t underestimate the value of loving yourself!  When you love yourself you project happiness.  You speak with greater confidence.  You love deeply and without inhibition.

You don’t need him to provide materially for you since you have a great career.  You don’t need him to complete you, or to make you feel loved and appreciated.  There is no imbalance, no power struggle.  This is a relationship built on mutual respect.

The more empowered you are, the more you love yourself, the more attractive you are to men that want something similar.  Your partner doesn’t want to change you, control you or compete against you.  He sees your independence and strength as one of your best traits.  You’re exhilarating to be around!

Always remember, the stronger you are as individuals, the stronger the two of you will be as a team.  You will feed off each other’s positivity, contagious enthusiasm, and mutual respect for each other.  Self improvement is the BEST way to strengthen a relationship with two equals.

This is a recipe for an amazing relationship that doesn’t end with tragedy or heartbreak.  Don’t panic just because you have a good thing going.  Trust each other and stay positive.  You may be surprised to learn that sometimes a happy ending really does come true when you let it happen!