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Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend

5 Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend that Make Him Love You

No doubt about it—one of your most effective weapons in the “fall in love with me” game are open-ended and romantic questions. And believe it or not, the stranger and more madly hypothetical they are, the better.

Men love logical riddles. They love doing mental gymnastics and deciding what their “logic” tells them to do in an ambiguous situation.

And yes, they love hypothetical scenarios that allow them to exert their sexuality, their freedom, and their wild imagination.

So right away, let’s get the BAD questions out of the way. Yes or no scenarios are boring. Trying to feel out his desire for commitment is a bad idea. Questions like “Would you ever go shopping with me?” or “How many girls have you slept with before me?” are just going to fall flat.

You’re NOT testing him. You’re evoking his logic and emotion. It’s like a waking dream—one where gets to sharpen his mental faculties (and realize his love for you) by thinking new thoughts that he’s never entertained before.

Remember the goal. Get him remembering, as well as using his imagination. Think of asking hypothetical questions as an indirect way of asking him to recall his favorite memories. (As you might remember from previous articles or books, getting a man to dwell on positive associations, reflects well on you. He begins to associate you with happiness)

Here are 5 questions that are so evocative, they’re sure to make him fall in love with you.

1. What were you childhood dreams and how much have they changed?

This question is a variation on the “what is your happiest memory?” (another great question). Instead of merely asking him to share memories, you’re challenging him to think back to childhood and then compare those memories to his current ambitions. It’s a great way to get him thinking about the past, present and future.

2. Is there anything you’ve never told anybody? (Or anything you wouldn’t want your family / friends to know?)

Another beautiful line, since you’re daring him to confide in you something secretive and scandalous—elevating you to the status of VIP in his life. He doesn’t confide in people he doesn’t trust. You’re asking him to trust you. You’re asking him to share a secret. More importantly, you’re letting him know that he can tell you literally anything and not feel judged or embarrassed because of it. It’s a new level of intimacy he’s going to want to feel more often—so keep these kinds of questions coming!

3. What is your wildest fantasy of all time?

Men love this question and especially once they clarify, “Sexual or non-sexual?” and of course your answer should be “Both.” Men are all about ambition. Ambition drives their ego, their sexuality, their entire perspective of the world. They dream big. They want to feel powerful and they want to provide for the woman they eventually come to love.

So asking an open-ended question like this will challenge him to share his dreams with you. He may have fantasies of sky-diving, climbing a mountain or doing something monumental and physical. Or he may be an artist fantasizing about great success. Now that you know what his dreams are, you can help him work towards his own self-chosen goals. You know what drives him and can always inspire him to be the best version of himself he’s always wanted to be.

Sexually speaking, do encourage him to share his most taboo fantasy—with promises not to laugh or shame him. If he can’t share his most private thoughts with you, who else is he going to confide in? Don’t feel threatened at his fantasy, if it involves someone else or something you might never do in real life. Just the fact that he’s sharing this information with you should be a huge turn on for him. Men love the FREEDOM to speak their sexual fantasies almost as much as the fantasy itself.

4. What is your favorite ____?

The game of favorites is a rather obvious and yet subtle technique—allowing you the opportunity to learn about him while also associating yourself with all the positives in his life. Challenge him to choose the “best” and “most favorite” option in everything, whether it’s books, movies, vacations, video games, musicians, art, drink or food.

In fact, it’s better to avoid too many negative or depressing scenarios about the past or about death and regret. He might feel inclined to share these memories, and if and when he does, encourage him to do so. But don’t bring them up. The goal of making him remember is to bring a smile to his face. Let him remember positive experiences in his life and identify you as someone who instantly triggers these positive images and feelings. Soon, he will learn that all good feelings and memories seem to emanate from your mellifluous voice. Nicely done!

5. If money wasn’t an issue what would you do for yourself? And for others?

Another great question, since it challenges him to think beyond just instant gratification—and expose what he really wants out of life, and who he truly loves. Will he shower attention on his family? Or will he take up a social cause? You may actually challenge him to think deeper to the extent that he finds his purpose in life.

Believe it or not MANY men – even successful men – feel as if they are flailing, stalling and not living life to its fullest. They may have an idea of being successful, but deep down they question what their purpose is and what good they want to do for the world.

You can help them realize this—not by feeding them information that you want to hear, but by challenging them to think deeper. And to get in touch with those buried feelings and heroic impulses.

And yes, if you help him realize that he can do good for the world, and reach beyond his wildest dreams, and feel GREAT about himself…

He will definitely remember you as the source of his inspiration. His muse. The one woman who really opened his eyes and helped him become who he was “destined” to become. He will fall in love with you then, as he realizes you are very much a part of himself!

Questions really are where love begins. Don’t limit a man by giving him boring Yes or No questions and scenarios. Expand his mind by asking him questions to make him fall in love that no one else has ever asked him. You’ll be amazed at the result!

10 Man-Melting Phrases That Make Him Yours

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Talk soon,

Matthew Coast

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