When you think of an addiction, you may think of negative imagery. But sometimes you can be “addicted” to something that’s pretty good for you. Like exercise, reading, new hobbies, or gardening. So in the same vein, let’s say you could get the guy you love ADDICTED to you – as in, in love with you, obsessed with you, and only interested in you.
Impossible, you might think. After all, men are easily tempted, right? That’s what a lot of people seem to think. But the truth is that men are not tempted by just sex alone. They’re tempted by the desire to bond with someone, or to experience the excitement of falling in love.
They are tempted by the positive feelings that meeting someone new brings.
If a man is feeling lonely or unfulfilled in a relationship, he is far more likely to have a roving eye – and to question the good relationship she already has.
So the whole secret in keeping a man obsessed with you is to understand what actually tempts him, and what other women can offer him.
The answer may surprise you. Namely, that most women offer him “very little.” That’s why it’s easy for him to “come back” to you – and in most cases, he never seriously thinks about leaving or cheating.
Let’s start by discussing three “Femme Fatale” qualities that men instantly find addictive.
1. A Mysterious and Beautiful Woman
If most men are “tempted” by a strange new woman, then there are two things he’s looking for. Beauty and a mysterious personality. He enjoys the challenge of meeting someone new and discovering who she is.
While you can try to do your best Scarlett Johansson impersonation, it’s not necessarily about playing a mysterious character. Rather, the quality of mystery is simply the state of being challenging, withholding information, and not sharing too much about yourself.
Just this state of mind is all you really need to be mysterious. When you’re emotionally attracted to someone you are usually tempted to OVER-SHARE. You want him to like you, so you talk about everything important, and everything on your mind. Sure, it’s a lot of fun…
But if he’s not LEADING that conversation then he’s trailing behind. And that means he’s slowly backing away, realizing that you like him more than he likes you. If you are not matching his enthusiasm, you are pushing too hard.
That’s why remaining a mystery is the best way to keep him interested in you. A mysterious woman doesn’t take over the conversation. She lets him lead the conversation. She answers the questions he asks, but doesn’t volunteer any other information. She only makes statements if they’re cryptic, funny, or even a little cheeky.
You see, playing with his curiosity is the best way to keep him obsessed with you, always wanting to solve “the riddle” that you are.
2. A Positive and Fun Friend
This is an underrated quality, because so many people today have a negative attitude. We see it all over social media, and we usually think nothing of it.
Sure, people should feel free to express their emotions. There’s no question about that.
But the toxicity, the stress, and the anger of some people…well, it’s palpable! It’s unpleasant to hear or read, time and time again. And you better believe that people who are negative in their everyday conversation are just as negative when it comes to arguing about their relationships.
And guess what? Being negative all teh time really drives a lot of men crazy. It drives women crazy too. It drives anyone who tries to be a happy person a little mad when your partner only sees gloom and doom in the world.
No wonder then men can be “tempted” by a fresh new face who is all smiles, laughing, joking around and having a FUN and POSITIVE attitude.
That’s the best way to get a guy addicted to you, is to constantly give him a fun conversation. Make sure he associates you with only positive feelings. That’s going to make a big difference when it’s YOU vs. some other girl who is always bringing him down, or complaining about something.
3. Always Project High-Value
Now this one might be a little confusing, but the concept is basically that you must remind a man that you are not easy, not cheap, not easily impressed, not ordinary, and not low or average value.
No, you are something special. You are a high-value woman in contrast to the “average girl” he meets and sees on a daily basis.
Now what does high value really mean? Some people think it’s all about being an Instagram model and wearing brand name clothes. Doesn’t that increase your price?
No, of course not.
High-value is the idea that you realize your own self-worth. You speak and carry yourself with confidence. You’re mindful that you deserve the relationship you want, and NOT the relationship you settle for.
You don’t play “hard to get” but you DO make him work a little harder for your devotion, your loyalty, and your most intimate affection. You constantly remind him that you only respond to the effort he puts forth.
You take pride in your job, your career, and your hobbies. Family time and spiritual time – all of it is important to you, and is part of what makes you so special. Your skillset, your values, your personality – all of it it contributes to a very high price.
He can’t put forth minimal effort and think that’s going to impress you. You’re not “unavailable” because you’re playing games with him. You simply value your time and won’t compromise your standards just to please him.
And that’s what he’s going to love most about you. Your values, your morals, the loyalty you have to the life you have NOW.
That’s the attitude that he finds irresistible and is eventually going to fall in love with. He wants to see you and think of you as successful and high-worth. He wants to know that you are nothing like an ordinary woman, but someone who goes above and beyond.
If you can remember these three fantastic qualities, and constantly give him that stream of emotional foreplay, you will always hold his attention. And he will become obsessed with you, enamored with you, and enchanted with you.
That’s when he really starts to work harder to get you to commit to him. And that’s how your story can end happily ever after.
Want to learn more? Read my books on relationships and getting a man to fall in love fast!
